A somewhat modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the Dakota prairie without water. His horse had already died of thirst. He's crawling along the dusty ground, certain that he has breathed his last breath, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the ground several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the ground and discovers what looks to be an old briefcase.

He opens it and out pops a genie.

But this is no ordinary genie. She is wearing an IRS ID badge and a dull gray dress. There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear.

'Well, cowboy,' says the IRS genie, 'You know how I work....you have three wishes.'

'I'm not falling for this,' said the wise cowboy, 'I'm not going to trust an IRS genie.'

'What do you have to lose partner? You've got no t***sportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!'

The puzzled cowboy thinks about this for a minute and decides that the genie is right. 'OK! I wish I were alongside a lush spring with plenty of food and drink.'

***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself beside the most beautiful spring he has ever seen, and he's surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

'OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish?'

'My second wish is that I am rich...rich beyond my wildest dreams.'

***POOF*** The cowboy finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.

'OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!'

After thinking for a few minutes, the cowboy says, 'I wish that no matter where I go, young beautiful women will want and need me.'

***POOF*** He was turned into a tampon.

Moral of the story:

If the U.S. government offers to help you, there's going to be a string attached.

Hi, Larry. Long time no talk to! You live up in Idaho not far from my sister and her family. She lives just outside of Boise. My older son was born in Idaho Falls, Idaho, while my ex-husband was at a Navy training school located near there. (My ex was a nuclear reactor operator on the FM subs during the Vietnam War.)

I suppose you're just thrilled about the thousands of imported, illegal Muslims from Syria headed soon to be housed in Idaho, or are you aware of it yet? We've now got Muslim relocation camps in almost every state of the Union and there is absolutely no way to track the backgrounds of these Muslims to know just how many terrorists might be among them, or how many terrorists they might be harboring.

No, I don't h**e Muslims. I actually pray for the ones who are totally ens***ed by their own religious/political belief system and virtually subject to all of the tortures of Sharia Law. But, trust a Muslim? Never. Not as far as I can throw one. They all have the same agenda -- take over the globe for Allah. And, the terrorists? They are vicious, evil, torturing and murdering psychopaths, not to mention demonically possessed. The terrorists are now building a spiderwebbing network throughout every state and city in the country, so all of us need to be aware it. The FBI knows it, too.

Well, you know the ropes. Pray. Prepare. Stand firm for God and country (occupy), lock'n load, and don't remain silent.

God bless you larrypuckett1939! Keep waving Old Glory! This country has a whole lot bigger problems than "Michelle's" school lunches and her(?) race-baiting tactics. The civil war is heating up now and the battle lines are drawn, spiritually/politically and physically. The g*******ts, c*******ts, f*****ts and Islamics are taking over this country. It's too soon to quit now. We might die trying, but we can't stop trying to stop them.