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And these people will be voting soon...
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Apr 24, 2019 12:22:49   #
fullspinzoo
 
archie bunker wrote:
Aren't you fairly young? I know at 55 I've been one of the young-uns here on Geezer Central for a few years.


So nice to know I'm part of Geezer Central. Wow!!!

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Apr 24, 2019 12:24:48   #
The Critical Critic Loc: Turtle Island
 
archie bunker wrote:
Aren't you fairly young? I know at 55 I've been one of the young-uns here on Geezer Central for a few years.


Lol! You’re old enough to be my dad. I won’t be 28 until August. Guess I would be considered a puppy around here...

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Apr 24, 2019 12:50:02   #
eagleye13 Loc: Fl
 
The Critical Critic wrote:
Note: this is not my personal story, it was sent to me by a friend.
__________________________________

Everyone should start carrying $2 bills!

I'm STILL laughing!!

I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills and bring them out in public.

The younger generation doesn't even know they exist!

STORY:

On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat.

I have a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure with the $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about irritating anyone for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me: 'Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito please, to go.' Server: 'That'll be $1.04. Eat in?'
Me: 'No, it's to go.' At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.
Server: 'Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back.' He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot.

The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server: 'Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?'
Manager: 'No. A what?'
Server: 'A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me...'
Manager: 'Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill.'
Server: 'Yeah, thought so.'

He comes back to me and says, 'We don't take these.

Do you have anything else?'

Me: 'Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?
Server: 'I don't know.'
Me: 'See here where it says legal tender?'
Server: 'Yeah.'
Me: 'So, why won't you take it?'
Server: 'Well, hang on a sec.'

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a shoplifter, and says to him, 'He says I have to take it.'

Manager: 'Doesn't he have anything else?'
Server: 'Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change.
Manager: 'I'm not opening the safe with him in here.'
Server: 'What should I do?'
Manager: 'Tell him to come back later when he has real money.'
Server: 'I can't tell him that! You tell him.'
Manager: 'Just tell him.'
Server: 'No way! This is weird. I'm going in back.

The manager approaches me and says, 'I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night.'

Me: 'It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill.'
Manager: 'We don't take those, either.'
Me: 'Why not?'
Manager: 'I think you know why.'
Me: 'No really, tell me why.'
Manager 'Please leave before I call mall security.'
Me: 'Excuse me?'
Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'
Me: 'What on earth for?'
Manager: 'Please, sir..'
Me: 'Uh, go ahead, call them.'
Manager: 'Would you please just leave?'
Me: 'No.'
Manager: 'Fine -- have it your way then.'
Me: 'Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?'

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect.

A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.

Guard: 'Yeah, Mike, what's up?'
Manager (whispering): 'This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money.'
Guard: 'No kidding! What?'
Manager: 'Get this. A two dollar bill.'
Guard (incredulous): 'Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?'
Manager: 'I don't know. He's kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty.'
Guard: 'Oh, so the fifty's fake!'
Manager: 'No, the two dollar bill is.'
Guard: 'Why would he fake a two dollar bill?'
Manager : 'I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?'
Guard: 'Yeah.'


Security Guard walks over to me and......

Guard: 'Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use.'
Me: 'Uh, no.'
Guard: 'Lemme see 'em.'
Me: 'Why?'
Guard: 'Do you want me to get the cops in here?'

At this point I'm ready to say, 'Sure, please!' but I want to eat, so I say, 'I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill. I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him. He takes the bill turns it over a few times in his hands, and he says,

Guard: 'Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?'
Manager: 'It's fake.'
Guard: 'It doesn't look fake to me.'
Manager: 'But it's a two dollar bill.'
Guard: 'Yeah? '
Manager: 'Well, there's no such thing, is there?'

The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue and is an idiot. So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.


Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff.

Just think...

those two will be voting soon!!?!

YIKES!!!
Note: this is not my personal story, it was sent t... (show quote)


Every time I go to the bank. I ask for $2 bills, to put them in circulation.
Half the time they don't have any.

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Apr 24, 2019 12:56:30   #
fullspinzoo
 
The Critical Critic wrote:
Lol! You’re old enough to be my dad. I won’t be 28 until August. Guess I would be considered a puppy around here...


Good head on your shoulders, especially at 28, but quit referring to me as 'Grandpa'.

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Apr 24, 2019 13:00:26   #
The Critical Critic Loc: Turtle Island
 
eagleye13 wrote:
Every time I go to the bank. I ask for $2 bills, to put them in circulation.
Half the time they don't have any.


True. Some banks only have a few on hand, most of the time you have to put in a request early. I think it’s a good thing that you put them in circulation.

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Apr 24, 2019 13:03:19   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
fullspinzoo wrote:
So nice to know I'm part of Geezer Central. Wow!!!


We could call it "Codger Corner" if that would suit you better!

Or, better yet, "The Curmudgeon Camp!"

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Apr 24, 2019 13:03:59   #
The Critical Critic Loc: Turtle Island
 
fullspinzoo wrote:
Good head on your shoulders, especially at 28, but quit referring to me as 'Grandpa'.


Lol! Thank you. But I would never refer to you as Grandpa. That would be disrespectful to my elders that are not related to me. How about ‘uncle’ fullspinzoo?

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Apr 24, 2019 13:04:35   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
The Critical Critic wrote:
Lol! You’re old enough to be my dad. I won’t be 28 until August. Guess I would be considered a puppy around here...


I have underwear older than you...

Reply
Apr 24, 2019 13:10:42   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
archie bunker wrote:
We could call it "Codger Corner" if that would suit you better!

Or, better yet, "The Curmudgeon Camp!"


I would prefer just
elderly scholar, thank you

Reply
Apr 24, 2019 13:17:50   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
badbobby wrote:
I would prefer just
elderly scholar, thank you


Old smartass would be much easier to say after a few beers, but if that's your preference, I'll do my best to honor it out of pure respect, BB!

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Apr 24, 2019 13:18:46   #
The Critical Critic Loc: Turtle Island
 
archie bunker wrote:
I have underwear older than you...


Haha! I hope more than one pair.

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Apr 24, 2019 13:29:13   #
EN Submarine Qualified Loc: Wisconsin East coast
 
archie bunker wrote:
Aren't you fairly young? I know at 55 I've been one of the young-uns here on Geezer Central for a few years.


Just wait until you are observing mankind through the eyes of an 85 year old. Today is a bit different than in the 30's.

Reply
Apr 24, 2019 13:32:54   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
The Critical Critic wrote:
Haha! I hope more than one pair.


Huh? Why is it called a "pair" of underwear? Mine are one unit.
But I have a few that are pretty old. My silk boxers with horseshoes on them come to mind. My mother gave them to me for Christmas when I was still married to my first, and me, and the second are working on 24? years now, I think. Hell, I can't remember! It's been a long damn time, and I still have those boxers.

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Apr 24, 2019 13:40:36   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
EN Submarine Qualified wrote:
Just wait until you are observing mankind through the eyes of an 85 year old. Today is a bit different than in the 30's.


I think I am that old. My body, and mind are just young.
I was born 100 years too late is what Granny always told me.

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Apr 24, 2019 13:52:14   #
The Critical Critic Loc: Turtle Island
 
archie bunker wrote:
Huh? Why is it called a "pair" of underwear?Mine are one unit.

I have always wondered about that too. A wise man once told me it was because they’re responsible for holding a pair, until you got married.
Quote:
But I have a few that are pretty old. My silk boxers with horseshoes on them come to mind. My mother gave them to me for Christmas when I was still married to my first, and me, and the second are working on 24? years now, I think. Hell, I can't remember! It's been a long damn time, and I still have those boxers.

Wow! That’s a long time. I see you’re the sentimental type, lol. I prefer boxers myself, I have one pair that are at least two years old!
They’re Pepé La Pew, an ex gave them to me, lol.

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