Auntie Dee wrote:
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will receive an economic stimulus payment; here are some facts to ponder:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus?
A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q: Where will the government get this money?
A: From taxpayers.
Q: Is the government simply giving me back my own money, then?
A: No, only a smidgen of it.
Q: What is the purpose of this payment?
A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy.
Q: Isn't that stimulating the economy of China?
A: Shut up.
How to help the U. S. Economy with your stimulus check:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.
* if you spend it on gasoline, it will go to the Arabs.
* if you purchase a computer, it goes to India, Taiwan or China.
* if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.
* if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
* if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan.
* if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead, keep the money in the USA by:
(1) Spending it at a yard sale, thrift shop, or
(2) Going to a ballgame, local theater, or
(3) Going out to a Restaurant, or
(4) Spending it on prostitutes, or
(5) Beer, or
(6) Tattoos
(These are the only American businesses still operating here!)
Cribbed this from another forum but made me chuckle!
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will receive an e... (
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