Masks have been the greatest way for us to distinguish between morally superior people and all the evil selfish people. But how will the world know what a good person you are when masks are no longer required?

Here are 10 easy ways to keep feeling morally superior once the p******c is over:

Never stop wearing a mask as long as you live: This is probably the simplest solution. Wear your mask forever. Breathe in that sweet, sweet, moral superiority and CO2.

Start a podcast about your time wearing a mask: Bring in co-hosts who also wore masks, and talk about how you wore masks. As a bonus, do it while wearing a mask.

Get a tattoo of your mask on your face: There's no better way of reminding everyone how important masks used to be and how important you were for wearing one.

Start an HOA in your suburban neighborhood: Oh-- you already started one? Of course you did!

Declare a climate emergency and switch to an all-bug diet: Bugs are the most morally superior thing to eat. Also, be rich and drive an electric car. Shame all people who do not do the same.

Punch a white male in the face every day: If you're not already doing this, what the heck is wrong with you? Go punch a white male in his dumb white face!

Travel only by train for the rest of your life: Trains are more moral than cars. Don't ask us why. We're actually not sure why but we're looking into it. If you don't have a train nearby due to living in a r****t Republican area, just ride a bike instead.

Drone strike a Middle-Eastern country: Obama, the Child of Light and Son of Hope did this often. Follow in the footsteps of Barack.

Become a Christian: Religious people are known for how morally superior they believe themselves to be. You'll fit right in!

Become an atheist: If there's anyone even more morally superior than a Christian, it's an atheist!

There you have it! You can't go wrong with this list! You are a good person just for reading it. Go and show the world how much better you are than them!

Don't worry fam-- we here at The Babylon Bee are morality experts. We got you. https://babylonbee.com/news/10-ways-to-feel-morally-superior-to-everyone-when-masks-are-no-longer-required

In an article reporting on Kristi Noem’s decision to veto the “Fairness in Girls’ Sports” bill, CNN breaking-news reporter Devan Cole claimed yesterday that there’s no way to determine a child’s “g****r identity” at birth.

“It’s not possible to know a person’s g****r identity at birth, and there is no consensus criteria for assigning sex at birth,” Cole asserted, in a statement better fit for an unhinged opinion article than a news article by a breaking-news reporter. https://www.cnn.com/2021/03/30/politics/south-dakota-t*********r-sports-kristi-noem/index.html

Does anyone really place any credibility in news outlets like CNN anymore?

“There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn’t true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.”
~ Soren Kierkegaard

We the People Need the Power to:

1. Reverse every one of Biden’s/Liberal Congress moves, bar none, and real soon now!
2. Close the border and restore our sovereignty,

3. Ship all I******s back to their home nations, and then create a new I*********n L*w,

4. Create a trustworthy e******n process,

5, Suppress Marxism, Socialism, Progressivism,

6. Return to Full Constitutional government,

7. Ensure Conservatism prevails,

8. Maintain a strong military, free of nonsense,

9. Clear up the C****-** p******c with all the force of government and industry to rescue our economy.


Give us all a plan to achieve these ends! How can that happen?