One fine morning Archie was sitting on his porch, enjoying a coffee, waiting for Mrs. B to finish cooking up his grits, and watching his chickens...
It occurred to him that his cock, Ol' Slat, was getting a little grey in the feathers and might not be as capable as he once was...
Being a man of action Archie hopped onto his pickup and headed over to Badbobby's Chicken Emporium to get himself a younger, more energetic cock...
Arriving at the Emporium Archie was greeted by his good pal Badbobby and explained his situation... Badbobby was of course sympathetic to, and understanding of, the many flaws of Ol' Slat...
Badbobby brought out a fine preening specimen and introduced it as Lil Mikey... He assured Archie that despite this cock's diminutive size and 'liberal' coloring, it would crow louder than any cock and would never back down no matter how hard the wall hit back..
Archie decided that size doesn't matter when it comes to cocks and agreed to buy the little fella...He stuck him in his truck and brought him home...
Upon being released to the yard Lil Mikey immediatly recognized that Ol' Slat was the king of the roost... Puffing up his tail feathers, he strutted over to Ol' Slat and informed him that his time was over and Lil Mikey would run things from now on...
"Run things, you say" responded Ol' Slat...
"Are you challenging me to a race?"
"That is exactly what I am doing you soggy old soy eater" Lil Mikey crowed...
"Well, all right then... I accept" Ol' Slat said...
"The loser must leave the yard forever... And no more crowing"....
"Agreed" said Lil Mikey....
"But I suppose, considering my advanced age and your extreme fitness, I should be given a bit of a head start, no?" queried Ol' Slat...
"I'll give you a count of ten old man, then be prepared to look at this cock from behind" Lil Mikey taunted (Apparently trash talk is different in Florida)
"one, two, three.. Go...." said Ol' Slat and took off...
Lil Mikey counted to ten..(no easy feat considering he only had eight toes... And sprinted off in pursuit...
Around the wheel barrow.... Through the crabgrass... Under the porch... Ol' Slat ran as only a finely tuned navy marine could... But Lil Mikey gained on him foot by foot... The young cock chasing the old...
Coming up to the chicken coop... Lil Mikey only a foot behind... Ol' Slat's defeat all but ensured... Lil Mikey had almost caught Ol' Slat.
BOOM!
Suddenly Lil Mikey exploded in a ball of feathers..
Ol' Slat smiled and rested as Archie came across the yard, cradling his shotgun and cursing....
"Damn that Badbobby! He sold me a gay rooster!"
And that's why Ol' Slat is still the King of the Roost...
One fine morning Archie was sitting on his porch, ... (