While wondering around in my backyard, I tripped and fell down. I guess I'm explaining in which direction I fell, to indicate that gravity was still working at the time. Needless to say, the ground stopped me from falling all the way through the planet. In any case, once I stopped bouncing, I immediately noticed a rather rank smell, a familiar smell. Yep, you guessed it - dog poo - into a pile of which my face was resting. I have 7 dogs, so the odds were pretty good that this would happen if ever my face came into contact with the ground, a situation I usually try to avoid. Now I know why for realz.

I did discover something new out of this experience and that is; no matter what you do, the smell of canine butt cookies will remain for at least 24 hours. No matter how much soap, bleach, paint thinner or gasoline one's face is scrubbed with, the smell remains. Nasal lavage with vinegar, bleach and ammonia is equally ineffective at eliminating the smell of dog dukey from one's face, you just have to wear it out.

Now I'm convinced that my dogs elaborate dump site hunt, is them playing the odds in their heads, about where I'm likely to do a face plant. I don't know which of them won the betting pool this time, but I notice them all sitting on the deck watching, with innocent looks on their faces, when I regained my feet. I've watched them pretty carefully, to see if I could spot one of them in a particularly chipper mood, but so far, they're all playing it safe - but I know better. I was not aware that dogs could laugh, but I'm sure that is the sound I was hearing as I entered the house after my feces face episode. It was not my wife, this time, as she wasn't home at the time, or she'd have been accused - of the laughing, not the crapping in the yard, I haven't caught her doing that yet.

Don't think this can't happen to you either, as dogs are equal opportunity terrorists, leaving IED's, Improvised Exposed Doo doo mines for anyone to slam their faces into, and the more animals you have, the greater the odds that you'll become a victim. BTW, cats are worse - they cover their feline fecal mines with a few leaves to hide them from casual observation. I have 3 cats, so my odds of another feces face episode are quite high. Maybe, I'll just stay indoors from now on, or at least, use my cane. The more I think about it, the more the latter sounds good - at least I can knock those "innocent" looks off a few faces in retribution.

Npppppp, nooooooo, not you too....lolol

They are so ugly they are cute...The field across the street from my home has Prairie dogs...Good thing not many...I kept waiting to see one in the open area between homes here but so far none...Thank You much..Again tho they are so ugly they are cute...My neighbor told me don't tempt them with anyyyyy food...

How are you feeling now?? Getting stronger by the day I am sure.....

How's your beautiful wife too...

Merry Christmas to you, your wife and that clan of love you have too..

From my tree to yours, tell Dave Santa smiles on him often...