"You can say an foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'you're right!' I never would've thought of that!" ---Dave Barry

"If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise." ---unknown

"Some days, you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant." ---unknown

"Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about puppies." ---Gene Hill

"In dog years, I'm dead." ---unknown

"To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs." ---Adolph Huxley

"A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down." ---Robert Benchley

"Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives." --Sue Murphy

"No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation." ---Fran Lebowitz

"Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul...chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest h****rs on earth!" ---Anne Tyler

"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult." ---Rita Rudner

"If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons." ---James Thurber

"You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets."-Nora Ephrom

"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful." ---Ann Landers

"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea." ---Robert A Heinlein

'In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him." ---Dereke Bruce