padremike wrote:
OK, time to inject a little Texas humor and lighten up the dialogue:
At a Houston busy bus stop, a woman who was waiting for a bus was wearing a tight leather skirt. As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus.
Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little,
thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg.
Again, she tried to make the step only to discover she still couldn't. So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more.
For the second time, attempted the step, and, once again, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg.
With little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more and again was unable to make the step.
About this time, a Texas oil rig worker who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus.
She went ballistic and turned to the would-be Samaritan and screeched, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!'
He just smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we were friends."
OK, time to inject a little Texas humor and lighte... (
show quote)
I was driving through Texas on vacation one time and I blew a tire. So I pulled over and got out of the car. Some guy pulled up behind my car got out and came walking toward me. I said hey buddy you mind helping me fix my flat tire. He said hell no I'm aint goin -a help you fix your flat tar, besides that I'm gonna F*** your old lady while you hold my balls out of the hot sand. A little while later were driving down the road and my wife said ---"that ole boy---he sure was tough wasn't he " I sad nah-- hell no he wasn't so tough ---didn't you see that sum bitch flinch when I dropped his balls in that hot sand.