well a lot is to be said about this, all those that have come before us, those generations that got us to where we are, all of them, the trillions of humans before us that lived and died, did one, just one, find the meaning of life? did they find themselves? what did they learn? what did they know that we dont? what did we lose? what have we gained? are we born into our time? does it matter? which god is the right one? is there one?
so many questions.
so...many
we are here, you are, I am, we are on this little blue marble in this solar system in this milky way in this universe, why? where are we? what are we? who are we? how did we get here?
but quite frankly:
I have no idea, we are all lost, and we can only hope that tomorrow will bring us a little closer to the answer. we find ourselves through what happens to us, and how we feel act and think every moment of every day.
I said once that the meaning of life is directly connected to your own individual perception of reality. that is the truest thing I have said so far.
many turn to god, and many turn to science.
a mans mind is unstable on its own, it was wired specifically to deal with the world around it, a human can only take so much silence before they go insane,
now think about this:
imagine nothingness to the best of your ability, you cannot fully, because you are aware that you are something, and you have never consciously experienced nothingness in a world of things.
but back to what I was saying, nothingness; your mind would go insane, it would stem from one question; what is this place? then it would continue; where am I? why is this like this? what is that?
now think, if you were conscious in a place of nothingness one question would simply make things happen, the universe without one conscious being in it does not exist because nothing is there to recognize it's existence.
now right about here on the journey to figure things out the mind gets confused and thoughts become unorganized because of too much possible information to be thought at once, I sure am getting to that point.
so lets work around it as best we can.
god, an everlasting.... what? being? force? essence? does it exist within its own creation? no? yes?
ALL of these questions I ask you must answer yourself, you hold the answer, whether it may be science, Christianity, Buddhism, Islam or Hinduism? or any other belief system and way of life?
all of this has been on my doc, this is a very light and rich summary of what is inside of it.
I am done with it, this thought has stopped, I have settled into a routine of finding myself, not as crazy anymore, more open and calm and relaxed and driven, not as lost, still finding my way no doubt, but relaxed and peacefully, that thought tortured me for an entire year.
here is another sample:
I am simply going through time, at the same pace as everyone else, but I feel life is not about grades, or about getting a good job, or even about making a living, not that that isnt a good thing. Life is about you, you are living, you are conscious, so you must find yourself, as of right now, I am still looking, because I am still living, and as long as you live, you will always find something new about yourself if you look hard enough. To those that say, life isnt all about you! they are so terribly wrong, life is all about you, you must stand by what you believe until death, there are those that will not stand by a single belief, I understand, but if you do not stand by YOUR ideals, life for you is meaningless, love life, although it may seem life may not love you, because you are alive, and just remember that humans are the only species that are not satisfied with just their existence, and life is everything and nothing, life is also just a product of consciousness, as with everything you see, hear, feel and perceive. I wish this document to be a testimony to humanity, I just feel a need, like no other to get out what I have to say, to enlighten those after me who have the path of the thinker, I pray to wh**ever may be pulling the strings in this incredible love of good and evil, love and hatred, compassion and ruthlessness that my life will have purpose, I want to see the world for as it is, not this jail of perception called a conscious mind. Though this is what I want, I have fear that what I may see if I ever get there has more evil than good, hatred than love, but then again both of which are just products of the mind, so with that being said, you must lose consciousness in order to gain it, you must have no knowledge of the world to judge it, to judge it you need a conscious, but in order to see the world as it really is, you must lose consciousness. I love the world, but I know this feeling I have is the product of something that is the product of something that we may never understand. What makes awareness? Knowledge? What makes knowledge? Awareness. Thus this life is nothing but an infinite paradox. Have I just cracked the code of life? No, because in order to do so you must do it without awareness. With this being said, our youth, our babies, who look at this world from an influenced perspective, are the closest to finding out the meaning, but at the same time, they believe wh**ever they experience as reality, because that is all they know, so I have come again to hit a wall of existence, existence of logic, space, and time. There are things beyond it that we may only experience for ourselves, but we can only experience it when we are of no knowledge of anything, not even life, or of self. This is the problem of life that has plagued itself.
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this my friends, was one of my fits of thought.
I am over that, I am done thinking myself in circles, it hurt my perception. but now I am not letting the world pass me by, I am taking notes, learning and working. I am closer to finding myself when I am not even looking, I just learn from life, not think myself in circles without looking around and learning more from life, not from thought that gets me nowhere. I am very very cryptic when I think, I don't know why.
this existential crisis I had is probably one of the most vulnerable things to me ever, so if you need to gut me, then go ahead, because I am past that literally mental back flip I had, I just tried to find the meaning of life through thought, stupidly and at a young age with little experience with life really.
this topic is probably everywhere considering it is mixed with the old me and the new, looser and mellow me. but I will let you all discuss this for now, I am very tired. and once again I ask you all this:
what do think?
:XD:
Dummy Boy wrote:
There is a difference between being religious and being a Christian: I assume by your declarations, you are neither religious or a Christian. I have no issue with that: I just think it is strange that you wish to stir the pot....
Anyhow, I do not support Christian Principles/beliefs/biblical reference as a way to run a country. There is this notion that if our leaders apply a veneer of Christian Recognition that somehow God will protect us, due to some faint biblical references.
I do not object to principles, unfortunately or fortunately we are a multi plural society. Wh**ever your principles are: they are protected by the law, meaning it not appropriate to k**l or steal from your neighbor. I would argue as an adult that disobeying my parents meant I would have a better life than otherwise...there is just too much or too little for the bible to provide for our society. And based on recent events, Greece, New York our supposedly progressive supreme court: thinks it is okay to pray before city meetings.
I will ask this simple question though? Since when you were prevented from praying to yourself-how 'bout never.
When you were forced to marry someone who is gay if you are not?
When you were forced to smoke marijuana, now that it is legal in a couple of states?
When were you asked to surrender your weapons in your gun safe or give up your ammunition?
Really, how many times are your rights violated per day? Or your Christian principles violated?
There is a difference between being religious and ... (
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hold on hold on hold on, I apologize, I need to re-examine the topic posted, I admit I skimmed over it.
no propaganda please wrote:
I h**e to tell you, but if it is an exploration of what makes you "you" you will never be done with it. Like life, it is an ongoing conquest. You might find it useful to keep going with it, even when you think you are done, and stick it away and reexamine it once in a while. Believe me, mine has changed over my 70 years. working with boys who have been molested, helping them put their lives back together, my attitudes have changed and in some ways become more tolerant and in other ways much less so. I don't think that before I die I will have yet figured out what makes me "tick" let alone what makes other people "tick" Keep your working copy on the back burner, where you can mentally pull it out and look at it, and rework ideas, but don't ever get so self absorbed with it, that you let the real life pass you by.
I h**e to tell you, but if it is an exploration of... (
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that has been an issue, I have been caught up in it before, I needed it to make sense of things that scrambled my mind, I have, and now after this year I will burn it and move on after I learn from it. but I will keep it on a hard drive and flash drive in case I feel the need to look back at my roots. I will burn it after I print it out, wherever I end up in it, then I will feel like a weight has been lifted, I can finally keep going, stronger than before.
I have had a lot less organized thoughts and rebuttals here recently because I am not constantly mentally stimulated by my problems anymore, but alas I will learn and get better.
but if I ever feel the need to record my thoughts again, I will start over on a fresh document. because the past is the past. I might however make it all one document, and read it all.
it is easier to figure someone else out besides you, because you cannot completely observe yourself and come to a conclusion, because that is a paradox. you can try, but it is better for someone else to learn about you externally.
I feel the need to explain that. I am going to build a topic off of that today.
Brian Devon wrote:
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Yes, George Bush is a true humanitarian. He and Cheney have both given up their golf games so that they can man the phones day and night...calling all the families of the one million + dead caused by our little Halliburton-Oil adventure in Iraq. Who would expect this type of behavior from sadistic war pimping chickenhawk weasels???
well brian, you are one sorry soul to not even open your mind, your ridiculous close-minded hostility who is not willing to try to understand the other side or lay down facts that are not twisted in such a way that is beyond the natural bias the mind lies to itself to form a reality that is not of the open world of perception tells me you have the mindset of a shill of some kind, however that can easily be disproven by your stating facts that can be backed up.
Asiseeit wrote:
Mate, I read your posts and for the life of me, can not find anyplace where you had a fit. Your remarks were not casual, but hardly something that anyone should find or take offense. You matter. You are a light, and by your handle you study Philosophy, thereby you know that there are no true right or wrong answers when dealing with people. If you wanted undisputed t***h, then stick to Mathematics. Trust me, you have not been in a fit!! Others are prone to a blue, but I have yet to see that in you. If you still must go, then do so knowing that you do have support and you do have a voice that needs to be heard.
Mate, I read your posts and for the life of me, ca... (
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the little "fit" i had was not on OPP really, when I said I relapsed, that showed no evidence of what that meant for this place, what happened during my short "relapse" did not show up here, I have had a past that hasn't really been stars and sunshine, I have learned to pick myself up and burn the past, and use that as fuel to keep moving.
quite frankly I have been through a lot of scarring stuff the past two years, stupid stuff that got very serious and dramatic and scattered me a lot, I am recovering just now, and I have little relapses where my state of mind changes drastically, call it pts I guess cause' its something that comes back to you every once and a while, that has happened twice so far, hopefully it will never happen again.
I am learning, and what happened has taught me but at the same time opened a raw wound, and I gotta close it before it keeps festering, the fact that I think more than anyone I know of does not help when you are trying to let a mental wound mend, I end up just picking at it as you would a scab before it heals, then it opens again and I have a little "fit" of depression.
thanks everyone who has helped me and encouraged me from my last post, I am bouncing back to stand tall again really fast, all those feelings are numbed, I have been screwed over recently twice by two people IRL, that was the cause of my little fit and I need to get my stuff together and keep going, thank you all. I am back again!
third times a charm!