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Clocks in Heaven
Apr 2, 2024 16:12:03   #
Darling Mary
 
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'

Reply
Apr 2, 2024 16:35:19   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
Darling Mary wrote:
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in fron... (show quote)

Nice transfer/deflection, Darling. When I first read this online, it was Donald Trump's clock being used as a ceiling fan. Regardless of who is the recipient of the punch line, it's a funny joke

Reply
Apr 2, 2024 16:35:21   #
guzzimaestro
 
Darling Mary wrote:
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in fron... (show quote)



Reply
 
 
Apr 2, 2024 20:06:29   #
Bad Bob Loc: Virginia
 
Darling Mary wrote:
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in fron... (show quote)



Reply
Apr 2, 2024 22:18:20   #
LostAggie66 Loc: Corpus Christi, TX (Shire of Seawinds)
 
slatten49 wrote:
Nice transfer/deflection, Darling. When I first read this online, it was Donald Trump's clock being used as a ceiling fan. Regardless of who is the recipient of the punch line, it's a funny joke


Yeah it is a funny joke.

Reply
Apr 2, 2024 23:17:36   #
F.D.R.
 
Darling Mary wrote:
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in fron... (show quote)


This reminded me of a sixteen part series on Netflix called 'My Demon'. The plot presents an unusual relationship between God and the Devil. The Devil represented by the Demon is in human form and in exchange for offering people 'help' they sign a 10 year contract for their souls. However during a chance encounter with a beautiful woman the Demon finds himself becoming less of a Devil. In his office the demon also had a wall of clocks for each of his contracts. The story is much more humorous than dark with interesting characters.

Reply
Apr 3, 2024 05:30:24   #
Ted_68
 
Darling Mary wrote:
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in fron... (show quote)


Lol. We all need some laughter these days - thanks

Reply
 
 
Apr 3, 2024 12:06:57   #
Wonttakeitanymore
 
slatten49 wrote:
Nice transfer/deflection, Darling. When I first read this online, it was Donald Trump's clock being used as a ceiling fan. Regardless of who is the recipient of the punch line, it's a funny joke


No ot fits Biden!

Reply
Apr 3, 2024 12:07:45   #
Wonttakeitanymore
 
Wonttakeitanymore wrote:
No ot fits Biden!


You are the number one deflector

Reply
Apr 4, 2024 14:01:31   #
Ronald Hatt Loc: Lansing, Mich
 
Darling Mary wrote:
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in front of the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, 'What are all those clocks?'

St. Peter answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone who has ever been on earth has a Lie-Clock.

Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move.'

'Oh', said the man. 'Whose clock is that?'

'That's Mother Teresa's', replied St. Peter. 'The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.'

'Incredible', said the man. 'And whose clock is that one?'

St. Peter responded, 'That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's Joe Biden’s clock?' asked the man.



St Peter replied, 'Jesus has it in his office. He uses it as a ceiling fan.'
A man died and went to Heaven. As he stood in fron... (show quote)



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