AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State

OH ! ... Let's Offend Everybody !


Q. What's the Cuban National Anthem?
A. Row, Row, Row Your Boat.

Q. Where does an Irish family go on vacation ?
A. To a different bar.

Q. What did the Chinese couple name their tan, curly-haired baby?
A. SumTing Wong.

Q. What do you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A. A speech impediment.

Q. Why aren't there any Afro-Americans on Star Trek?
A. Because they're not going to work in the future either.

Q. Why do Driver Ed classes in redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
A. Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

Q. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
A. The southern zoo has a description of the animal along with a recipe.

Q How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the 'F' word?
A. Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell, 'BINGO!'

Q. What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A. A northern fairytale begins, ....'Once upon a time...'
A southern fairytale begins,... 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this.'

Q. Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A. Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the United States

Oh, be quiet....just pass it on!

jimahrens Loc: California

Thanks a heap I need that.

Rdjarhead Loc: Oklahoma

You left out the polocks and the blondes. Other than that outstanding¡¡!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GEM lucas Loc: TRIADELPHIA ,WV

GEM lucas Loc: TRIADELPHIA ,WV

I think everyone will get a good laugh .I know I did.

archie bunker Loc: Texas

Q. What do you call a woman with one leg shorter thah the other?
A. Ilean
Q. What do you call a Japanese woman with one leg shorter than the other?
A. Irene
Q. Why were there only 49 contestants in the Miss Black U.S.A. pageant?
A. No one wanted to be Miss Idaho.

BearK Loc: TN

Good ones AuntiE

stan3186

Q. How many blacks does it take to pave a highway?
A. Depends on how thin you can slice them.

A Southern black guy finds a lamp and rubs it up to sell at the local pawn shop. Up pops a genie and says, you have 3 wishes chose well. The old black guy says okay, I know, I want the biggest black Cadillac in Detroit. The genie says fine and poof suddenly right in front of the guy is a huge black limo with the keys in it and all paperwork in the black guys name. Genie say "you have 2 more wishes, be careful. The old black guys say, I know, I want you to take that there kar and fill it full of money and then the genie goes poof, the car is full of $1000 bills so much that it is flowing out of all the windows. The old black guy says wow, now I'm rich. The genie says you have one last wish chose carefully. The old black guy thinks and thinks on it and then say well, i gots all the monies I'll ever needs, and I already has my kerr so then he says okay I know, " I want you to turn me White and put me between the legs of the most beautiful woman on earth. The genie goes poof and turns the old black guy into a Kotex.

GEM lucas Loc: TRIADELPHIA ,WV

LMAO :lol: :lol: :lol: ''GEM''

Liberty Tree

Here is one more:

British ships have HMS on them for His Majesty or Her Masesty's Ship
American ships have USS on them for United States Ship
Italian ships have TMB on them for Thatsa My Boat

archie bunker Loc: Texas

Q. Why did the jews wander in the desert for forty years?
A. Someone dropped a quarter.

Liberty Tree

I guess that is why they hated Gentiles. One of them must have found it first.

archie bunker Loc: Texas

Q. What do you call a kid with no arms. and an eyepatch?
A. Names

BearK Loc: TN

Had a Jewish friend from whom I asked directions one time. Her answer, "Don't ask me directions, it took my people 40 years to find their way out of the desert."

Loki Loc: Georgia

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?
One less drunk.
The first three words a redneck baby learns?
Attention, K-Mart Shoppers.


A fellow decides to buy property in France and become a gentleman farmer. Upon purchasing his property, he goes to the local market for some livestock. The first thing that catches his eye is a rabbit. After purchasing the rabbit, the seller tells him, "monsieur, 'ere in France we call zem Peters."
Next, the man sees a hen, and being desirous of eggs, he buys the hen. The seller informs him, "m'sieur, 'ere in la belle France, we call zem pullets, not hens."
Lastly, the fellow decides he needs a donkey, and buys one. The vendor informs him, "m'sieur, 'ere in France we call zem asses. Eef zis won geef you trouble, you must scratch behind his ears, and he will follow you once more."

The fellow sets off for home, with his rabbit under one arm the hen under the other, and leading the donkey on a rope. All of a sudden, the donkey balks, and sets down in the middle of the road. The man is at a total loss of what to do, as he cannot set down the hen or the rabbit to scratch the donkey's ears.
Suddenly, he spots an old woman walking toward him. When she gets closer he yells; "Hey Lady! Can I get some help here?" The old woman replies; "but of course m'sieur! How may I assist you?"
Thinking back to the advice of the 3 vendors who sold him his animals, he offers the rabbit and hen to the woman and says, "Here lady, hold my peter and pullet while I scratch my ass."