ForThePeople

From The Babylon Bee

https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-says-it-may-take-days-for-democrat-votes-to-be-harvested

WASHINGTON, DC — As the date of next week's midterm elections approaches, President Joe Biden used his Wednesday night address to warn everyone that the results may not immediately be known because it may take several days for enough Democrat votes to be harvested and double-counted.

"Despite the fact that third-world countries around the globe are capable of tallying their votes on the same day as their elections, it's simply not realistic to expect that from the world's most technologically advanced nation," Biden shouted with an unnecessary amount of anger to the assembled crowd made up entirely of White House staffers and the media. "Folks, we've got to take our time, find out how far behind we are, and wait for the unmarked vans carrying bags full of ballots to arrive in the middle of the night. Then we gotta find out how many times we have to count each ballot. Tomato soup."

As First Lady Jill Biden and Secret Service agents quickly grabbed the President and pulled him away from the podium, White House spokesperson Holly Caust provided the media with a backtracking statement. "What the President was actually trying to say is that we will make sure our democratic process plays out in its entirety without anyone's right to vote being suppressed. There's simply no time limit on counting votes, even if various state laws clearly state otherwise."

At publishing time, Democrat operatives across the country were continuing to stock up on snacks and making sure the voting machines at polling stations were successfully connected to the internet in preparation for next week's marathon vote-manufacturing sessions.

American Vet

Radiance3

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Joe Biden and Barack Obama for the last few days have been stamping all over cities and states lying to the American people. Imagine this Joe Biden with all the crimes and problems he'd created for 22 months, he accused that Donald Trump had created the problems.

This filthy mouth of Joe Biden loaded with crimes and lies spewing to the American people to clean his ass. He transferred his filth to the innocent Donald Trump.

Likewise Barack has been scaring the voters that if GOP wins, they'll take out Democracy. What is he talking about? When he and Biden had already converted this country to Totalitarian system.

That is why they are chasing and arresting all the Republicans their opponents. While all their massive crimes are hidden and forgiven. Hillary, Comey, the FBI's , Garland, Joe Biden and son Hunter, Barack, and all the powerful elites among them. MSM's covering their crimes as well. It is one of their weapons, aside from the FBI's, and Garland.

pegw

I didn't find this statirical piece funny.

son of witless

I know what you mean. I hate Statire and Starcasm.

American Vet

ROTFLMAO.......

proud republican Loc: RED CALIFORNIA

Of course you didn't....🙄😁

Bevvy

One day Biden met the Queen and asked her how was it that she was so successful and why all the people loved her.

"Well," said the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people."

Biden frowned, and then asked, "But how do I know the people around are really intelligent?"

The Queen took a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy; you just ask them to answer an intelligent riddle." The Queen pushed a button on her intercom. "Please send Tony Blair in here, would you?"

Tony Blair walked into the room and said, "Yes, Your Majesty?" The Queen smiled and said, "Answer me this please, Tony, your mother and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Tony Blair answered, "That would be me."

"Yes! Very good," said the Queen.

Biden went back home to ask Kamala Harris, his vice presidential choice the same question. "Kamala, answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure," said Harris. "Let me get back to you on that one." She went to her advisors and asked every one, but none could give her an answer. Finally, Kamala ran in to Sarah Palin out eating one night. Harris asked, "Sarah, can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it's not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Sarah Palin answered right back, "That's easy, it's me!"

Kamala smiled, and said, "Thanks!" Then, she went back to speak with Biden. "Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It's Sarah Palin!"

Biden got up, stomped over to Kamala, and angrily yelled into her face,

"No! You idiot! It's Tony Blair!"

proud republican Loc: RED CALIFORNIA

😄😄😄😄😄😄😄👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

American Vet

Too funny!!!!!!!!

JR-57 Loc: South Carolina

Of course you didn’t. I’m surprised you even recognized it as being satirical. I bet if you smiled your face would crack.

Radiance3

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The Democrat-Marxist have masterfully set up various fraudulent election schemes again this Nov. 8, for the votes counting process.

I suggest, the staff counting the votes must be handled by both Republicans and Democrats. That must be done in all Counties.

One of the most powerful forces that could cheat the election is the ballot counting. Kin surveillance and security must be enforced for accurate counting. Beware of the Marxist -democrats they are masters of fraud.

Smedley_buzkill

jimpack123 Loc: wisconsin

Whine, Whine and Whine, show me one law Biden has broke just one pleas no Executive order as 45 had a lot of executive orders as well.
Personally I am hoping for a GOP win for both the House and the Senate, Remember what happened last time. LOL

PZG1225 Loc: Florida

Gotta love the Bee!