know this is old
but mayhaps a few of you haven't seen it
still funny
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Target. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred
to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from
the local Target:
Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in
our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you
from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that
in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and
costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming
the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look'
using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
fitting room?
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile;
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the
clerks passed out.
-
badbobby wrote:
know this is old
but mayhaps a few of you haven't seen it
still funny
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Target. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred
to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from
the local Target:
Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in
our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you
from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that
in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and
costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming
the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look'
using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
fitting room?
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile;
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the
clerks passed out.
-
know this is old br but mayhaps a few of you have... (
show quote)
Just another day at Target...
badbobby wrote:
know this is old
but mayhaps a few of you haven't seen it
still funny
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Target. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred
to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from
the local Target:
Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in
our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you
from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that
in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and
costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming
the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look'
using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
fitting room?
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile;
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the
clerks passed out.
-
know this is old br but mayhaps a few of you have... (
show quote)
That's why I don't shop at Target anymore.
Larry the Legend wrote:
Just another day at Target...
Hate target very liberal administration! Anybody can use any bathroom or dressing room! Lots of people in protest filled their shopping cart, then left a note saying sorry had to go home to use the bathroom! Lol , never enough cashiers! Try to make u get a target card to save 5%! I said I can save 5% or more shopping at Walmart for the same items!
badbobby wrote:
know this is old
but mayhaps a few of you haven't seen it
still funny
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Target. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred
to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from
the local Target:
Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in
our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you
from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that
in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and
costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming
the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look'
using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
fitting room?
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile;
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the
clerks passed out.
-
know this is old br but mayhaps a few of you have... (
show quote)
This is still the funniest.
badbobby wrote:
know this is old
but mayhaps a few of you haven't seen it
still funny
After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Target. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred
to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she
loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from
the local Target:
Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in
our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you
from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are
documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other
people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,
'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to
leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that
in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and
costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying
and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a
mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked
the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming
the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look'
using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through,
yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the
fitting room?
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile;
then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the
clerks passed out.
-
know this is old br but mayhaps a few of you have... (
show quote)
Lolololhahahaha I had NOT heard that before
then I'm glad I re-posted it
My husband especially loved it.
badbobby wrote:
then I'm glad I re-posted it
There you go flirting with all of the girls again. Shame Shame Mama is going to get you.
bahmer wrote:
There you go flirting with all of the girls again. Shame Shame Mama is going to get you.
she knows I like the gentler sex
as long as I behave myself
badbobby wrote:
she knows I like the gentler sex
as long as I behave myself
The question is can you behave yourself? I think not.
bahmer wrote:
The question is can you behave yourself? I think not.
I shall leave that open to conjecture
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