Oldsailor65 Loc: Iowa

Little Johnny - an Oldie with a new twist !


The kids filed into class Monday morning. They were all very excited Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on salesmanship. Little Sally led off. "I sold Girl Scout cookies and I made $30" she said proudly.
"My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civic spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success."

"Very good," said the teacher.

Little Debbie was next. "I sold magazines," she said. "I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events."

"Very good, Debbie," said the teacher.

Eventually it was Little Johnny's turn. The teacher held her breath.
Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher's desk. "$2,467," he said.

"$2,467!" cried the teacher, "What in the world were you selling?"

"Toothbrushes," said Little Johnny.
"Toothbrushes," echoed the teacher. "How could you possibly sell enough toothbrushes to make that much money?"
I found the busiest corner in town," said Little Johnny. "I set up a Dip & Chip stand and I gave everybody who walked by a free sample."
They all said the same thing, "Hey, this tastes like dog shit." I would say, "It is dog shit. Wanna buy a toothbrush?"
I used the Nancy Pelosi method of giving you some crap, dressing it up so it looks good, telling you it's free and then making you pay to get the bad taste out of your mouth.

Little Johnny got five stars for his assignment

Canuckus Deploracus Loc: North of the wall

Belly still hurting...

That was a new one...

Thanks...

okie don

Reminds me of Pelosie saying:
You gotta vote on it and pass it before you can read it .
Remember ObamaCare.

no propaganda please Loc: moon orbiting the third rock from the sun

Love it!!!Great post. As Tony the Tiger says It's GRRREAT!!!

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

Wonttakeitanymore

Should be the mantra for the demonrat party, think I’ll go get some toothbrushes for the next time I work the polls

TrueAmerican

LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT !!!!!!

Larry the Legend Loc: Not hiding in Milton

Good one! Here's another:

Teacher: "Four crows are on the fence. The farmer shoots one. How many are left?"

Little Johnny: "None."

Teacher: "Listen carefully: Four crows are on the fence. The farmer shoots one. How many are left?"

Little Johnny: "None."

Teacher: "Can you explain that answer?"

Little Johnny: "One is shot, the others fly away. There are none left."

Teacher: "Well, that isn't the correct answer, but I like the way you think."

Little Johnny: "Teacher, can I ask a question?"

Teacher: "Sure."

Little Johnny: "There are three women in the ice cream parlor. One is licking, one is biting and one is sucking her ice cream cone. Which one is married?"

Teacher: "Hmm. The one sucking the cone?"

Little Johnny: "No. The one with the wedding ring on, but I like the way you think."

2quick4u Loc: Somewhere in central Tx...

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:

"Rome? Why would you want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking United," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"United", exclaimed the hairdresser? "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks its going to be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant."

"Boy, good luck on this trip of yours. You're going to need it."

A month later, the woman again came in to get her hair styled. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.

"It was wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in one of United's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot.

And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million remodeling job, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"

"Well," muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."

"Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.

Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."

"Oh, really! What'd he say?"

He said: "Who f*cked up your hair?

no propaganda please Loc: moon orbiting the third rock from the sun

Excellent comeback!!!