LOL!

That's about all I can say ... other than to just pour the contents from one bottle into another.

If that's your biggest "marital issue," I wouldn't complain!

Here's one about my second wife:

I have a pet peeve about people eating with their mouth open, smacking their lips or making other obnoxious sounds when they eat. When I first met my wife, I told her about how my most recent relationship ended because I couldn't stand the way my girlfriend ate. Just trust me: it was awful. I don't want to explain. Anyway, I took note that my bride-to-be ate very quietly and conservatively. Yippee!

We were living on the Hawaiian island of Oahu at the time, and we went to visit her parents on the Big Island for Thanksgiving dinner. They had a beautiful home perched high up the slope of Mauna Loa mountain/volcano. Had what was probably a 240-degree view of the ocean. Beautiful! Her two brothers and one of their wives were also there. As we sat at the table eating, I was aghast that every single person around the table ate loudly, with their mouths open...except my bride-to-be. I was pretty disgusted by it, but I didn't let it reflect on my sweetheart. I did wonder why everybody else in her family but her had such bad manners.

Fast forward several months: I have t***sferred to Washington, DC, and she is still in Hawaii. We agree to get married in Lake Tahoe, NV - kind of halfway for each of our families. Ceremony in Harrah's casino chapel went very well (tho a bit cheesy), as did the reception after. A friend of hers gave us a nice gift basket with cheese and c*****rs, grapes, and other fruit for us to indulge on as we holed up in our honeymoon suite. While in the bathroom, I heard a strange cracking and squishing sound coming from the bedroom. I went to see what it was, and it was my brand-new wife eating grapes! I didn't say anything at the time (didn't want to wreck our honeymoon), but I hoped and hoped that it was a one-time thing.

Nope! After she moved from Hawaii to DC to be with me, no longer feeling a need to restrain her eating habits since we were married, she filled my ears daily with her noisy eating. She knew I couldn't stand it. If I was looking away, she would feel free to smack her lips. When I would turn in her direction to see what all the noise was about, she would stop. I could never actually saw her chewing! She was quick! People - not just me! - could hear her munching and squishing from another room! It got so bad after a few years that I volunteered to do all of our grocery shopping (never telling her why). No more grapes, chips, iceberg lettuce, pretzels, or anything else that crunched. We ate a lot of soft foods during the 16 years we were married.

I share your pet peeve regarding people who eat with their mouths open It IS d********g. None of my children are, or were, guilty of this, nor was my wife. However, I have two grandchildren that do eat with their mouths open. I casually asked my son why they did it, his reply was: "My wife allows it". I never broached the subject again. When I am visiting their home, and partaking of a meal, I always sit where I don't have a frontal view of either of them. Were it another family, I would refuse their invitation to sup with them. To reiterate, it is ABSOLUTELY d********g!