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My last Trip To COSTCO...
Jun 13, 2016 19:01:26   #
Don G. Dinsdale Loc: El Cajon, CA (San Diego County)
 
After my 'open-heart' and 5 bypass's 3 years ago I was told to keep my weight down, now this..

MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, that weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog..

What did she think I had an elephant.?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!

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Jun 14, 2016 13:15:06   #
mcmlx
 
Don G. Dinsdale wrote:
After my 'open-heart' and 5 bypass's 3 years ago I was told to keep my weight down, now this..

MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, that weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog..

What did she think I had an elephant.?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!
After my 'open-heart' and 5 bypass's 3 years ago I... (show quote)


I thought it might have been because you asked the cashier how to use your credit card. When she said, "Face up, strip down".....

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Jun 15, 2016 16:07:16   #
lindajoy Loc: right here with you....
 
Don G. Dinsdale wrote:
After my 'open-heart' and 5 bypass's 3 years ago I was told to keep my weight down, now this..

MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, that weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog..

What did she think I had an elephant.?

So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!
After my 'open-heart' and 5 bypass's 3 years ago I... (show quote)


Another, off it goes,~~~~

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