Lost in t***slation
Mar 10, 2016 17:21:52 #
lpnmajor
Loc: Arkansas
Wherever I go, I try to amuse myself, usually at someone else's expense, but I don't intentionally try to hurt anyone. Most often, my entertainment occurs at Lowe's, because I'm there so much. An example would be, taking a 1x10x8 to checkout and telling them I need it cut into 1 inch pieces.
Here's one that went awry, somewhat.
I was with a friend at Lowe's and was using a f**e accent to try and throw him off. I use a lot of f**e accents, just because I'm weird that way. Anyway, at the checkout, he said something stupid and I responded with " I doan like jews inny more " ( think of Al Pacino in "scarface" for the accent, you know "say hello to my lil frien" ).
There was an older man standing behind us ( older than us that is ) and he began berating me for being an anti Semite. My friend was laughing, while trying to pretend that we weren't together ( at Lowes', keep your homophobia to yourself ). So, I turned a round and said " waz wrong wit jews? Are jews crazy? Why doan jews mine day own binez?".
While the old mans face turned purple, I looked around to see that everyone in the county was in the store - and staring at me. My loyal friend was staring at me as well, trying to blend in with everyone else and further disabuse anyone of the thought that we knew each other. Screwing up my courage, I looked at my friend, handed him my few items ( so he'd have to pay for them ) - and said "screw jews Manheim" and walked out the door.
His name isn't Manheim, BTW - it's Lowenstein - for realz. He still won't return my calls.
Here's one that went awry, somewhat.
I was with a friend at Lowe's and was using a f**e accent to try and throw him off. I use a lot of f**e accents, just because I'm weird that way. Anyway, at the checkout, he said something stupid and I responded with " I doan like jews inny more " ( think of Al Pacino in "scarface" for the accent, you know "say hello to my lil frien" ).
There was an older man standing behind us ( older than us that is ) and he began berating me for being an anti Semite. My friend was laughing, while trying to pretend that we weren't together ( at Lowes', keep your homophobia to yourself ). So, I turned a round and said " waz wrong wit jews? Are jews crazy? Why doan jews mine day own binez?".
While the old mans face turned purple, I looked around to see that everyone in the county was in the store - and staring at me. My loyal friend was staring at me as well, trying to blend in with everyone else and further disabuse anyone of the thought that we knew each other. Screwing up my courage, I looked at my friend, handed him my few items ( so he'd have to pay for them ) - and said "screw jews Manheim" and walked out the door.
His name isn't Manheim, BTW - it's Lowenstein - for realz. He still won't return my calls.
Mar 10, 2016 18:29:06 #
slatten49
Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
lpnmajor wrote:
Wherever I go, I try to amuse myself, usually at s... (show quote)
Waz did jew sez to upset heem :?:
Mar 10, 2016 20:14:32 #
lpnmajor
Loc: Arkansas
slatten49 wrote:
Waz did jew sez to upset heem :?:
Nuttin. I guess he wuz mad because I left the "German" behind to face the angry Jew. He didn't say a word all the way home, which was good for me - because he didn't ask for the money I owed him. :mrgreen:
It juz goes to show jews, wut kine uf sheet jews can git into wifout even tryin. Well, me anyway. :cry:
Mar 10, 2016 20:20:10 #
slatten49
Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
lpnmajor wrote:
Nuttin. I guess he wuz mad because I left the "German" behind to face the angry Jew. He didn't say a word all the way home, which was good for me - because he didn't ask for the money I owed him. :mrgreen:
It juz goes to show jews, wut kine uf sheet jews can git into wifout even tryin. Well, me anyway. :cry:
It juz goes to show jews, wut kine uf sheet jews can git into wifout even tryin. Well, me anyway. :cry:
Jew are not alone. :roll: :wink:
Mar 11, 2016 00:11:08 #
lpnmajor wrote:
Wherever I go, I try to amuse myself, usually at s... (show quote)
Whacked, truly you are~~and very funny....I would have been in hysterics there just as I am reading this, major~~~ :XD: :XD: :XD: :lol:
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