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The three kick rule
Feb 9, 2016 17:28:46   #
Elwood Loc: Florida
 
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa.

Eventually he shot down a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over it, the elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in New Zealand and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in North Wairarapa. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"

The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurred on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times, and then you kick me three times and so on, back and forth until someone gives up." The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney.

His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!

His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "You know what? Take the duck."







Reply
Feb 9, 2016 17:40:16   #
bahmer
 
Elwood wrote:
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa.

Eventually he shot down a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over it, the elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in New Zealand and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in North Wairarapa. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"

The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurred on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times, and then you kick me three times and so on, back and forth until someone gives up." The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney.

His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!

His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "You know what? Take the duck."
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North... (show quote)


The old farmer was smarter than the lawyer that's for sure.

Reply
Feb 9, 2016 18:40:58   #
Elwood Loc: Florida
 
bahmer wrote:
The old farmer was smarter than the lawyer that's for sure.


:lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup:

Reply
 
 
Feb 10, 2016 10:06:44   #
Parrothead Loc: In front of my laptop
 
I love when a lawyer story has a happy ending. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :-)

Reply
Feb 10, 2016 14:06:42   #
Elwood Loc: Florida
 
Parrothead wrote:
I love when a lawyer story has a happy ending. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :-)


:lol: :lol: Great, isn't it ? :mrgreen:

Reply
Feb 10, 2016 21:10:38   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
Elwood wrote:
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Wairarapa.

Eventually he shot down a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over it, the elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in New Zealand and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in North Wairarapa. We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.'"

The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?"

The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurred on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times, and then you kick me three times and so on, back and forth until someone gives up." The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney.

His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!

His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "You know what? Take the duck."
A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North... (show quote)



don't mess with old guys

Reply
Feb 10, 2016 21:27:51   #
Elwood Loc: Florida
 
badbobby wrote:
don't mess with old guys


:lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup: Yup. :mrgreen:

Reply
 
 
Feb 11, 2016 02:48:53   #
lindajoy Loc: right here with you....
 
badbobby wrote:
don't mess with old guys


Or smart older gentlemen!!! :thumbup: :thumbup:

Reply
Feb 11, 2016 02:49:13   #
lindajoy Loc: right here with you....
 
Elwood wrote:
:lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup: Yup. :mrgreen:


Good one, El~~ ;) :lol:

Reply
Feb 11, 2016 11:17:11   #
Elwood Loc: Florida
 
lindajoy wrote:
Good one, El~~ ;) :lol:


Thanks Linda. :-D

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