23 adult t***hs
Dec 14, 2015 11:58:55 #
Going the e-mail route. 24 doesn't count. :lol: :lol:
23 ADULT T***HS
1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument the instant you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest or Google Maps really need to start their directions on # 5.
I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Why do Bad decisions Always make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore wh**ever comes after Blu-Ray? I don't
want to have to restart my collection... again. I still have some cassettes in the drawer.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if
I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I
did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to
prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and
sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.
22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys
in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey -
but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
23. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and
the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important. (Ladies ... Quit Laughing! )
It just gets better as you get older, doesn't it?
24 I was in a Starbucks Coffee recently when my stomach started rumbling and I realized that I desperately needed to fart. The place was packed, but the music was really loud so to get relief and reduce embarrassment I timed my farts to the beat of the music. After a couple of songs I started to feel much better. I finished my coffee and noticed that everyone was staring at me. I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my Ipod (with ear piece)
23 ADULT T***HS
1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument the instant you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest or Google Maps really need to start their directions on # 5.
I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Why do Bad decisions Always make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore wh**ever comes after Blu-Ray? I don't
want to have to restart my collection... again. I still have some cassettes in the drawer.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if
I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I
did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to
prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and
sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,
and you can wear them forever.
22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys
in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey -
but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
23. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and
the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important. (Ladies ... Quit Laughing! )
It just gets better as you get older, doesn't it?
24 I was in a Starbucks Coffee recently when my stomach started rumbling and I realized that I desperately needed to fart. The place was packed, but the music was really loud so to get relief and reduce embarrassment I timed my farts to the beat of the music. After a couple of songs I started to feel much better. I finished my coffee and noticed that everyone was staring at me. I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my Ipod (with ear piece)
Dec 14, 2015 12:20:58 #
All true. A variation on #24. When, with a customer one time, the need to break wind was upon me, due to lactose intolerance. I thought I'd let it out gently and quietly. I swear that damn' thing registered 9 on the Richter Scale. :oops: :shock:
Dec 14, 2015 12:23:22 #
These were great El..... I experienced most but found some hysterical (fitted sheets) and the "nothing accomplished" was a spot on target.. Thanks.
Dec 14, 2015 12:33:29 #
I can definitely relate to #16. I never got laid the same night picking up a girl at church. That usually involved a second date. :lol: :lol:
Dec 14, 2015 12:39:33 #
[quote=Elwood]Going the e-mail route. 24 doesn't count. :lol: :lol:
23 ADULT T***HS
1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument the instant you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
I concur fully as I have lived long enough to have accomplished most all of these.
23 ADULT T***HS
1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument the instant you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
I concur fully as I have lived long enough to have accomplished most all of these.
awesome feeling.jpeg
Dec 14, 2015 14:31:35 #
slatten49
Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
I found #7 to be quite true, but not as bad as someone pretty much telling you how to get some place...block by block. :roll: :?
Dec 14, 2015 15:56:03 #
Dec 14, 2015 17:09:28 #
Big Bass wrote:
All true. A variation on #24. When, with a customer one time, the need to break wind was upon me, due to lactose intolerance. I thought I'd let it out gently and quietly. I swear that damn' thing registered 9 on the Richter Scale. :oops: :shock:
A big oops indeed. Lucky it wasn't wet. :shock: :lol: :lol:
Dec 14, 2015 17:16:39 #
kburns50 wrote:
These were great El..... I experienced most but found some hysterical (fitted sheets) and the "nothing accomplished" was a spot on target.. Thanks.
:lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup:
This shows you how to fold fitted sheets.
http://search.yahoo.com/yhs/search?p=how+to+fold+a+fitted+sheet+video&ei=UTF-8&hspart=mozilla&hsimp=yhs-004
Dec 14, 2015 17:17:47 #
Parrothead wrote:
I can definitely relate to #16. I never got laid the same night picking up a girl at church. That usually involved a second date. :lol: :lol:
Slow learner hey? :lol: :lol:
Dec 14, 2015 17:19:28 #
[quote=Onelostdog]
That picture is pretty damned accurate as far as I am concerned.
Elwood wrote:
Going the e-mail route. 24 doesn't count. :lol: :... (show quote)
That picture is pretty damned accurate as far as I am concerned.
Dec 14, 2015 17:20:01 #
slatten49 wrote:
I found #7 to be quite true, but not as bad as someone pretty much telling you how to get some place...block by block. :roll: :?
:lol: :lol: Your wife :?:
Dec 14, 2015 17:20:18 #
Zeno wrote:
I agree with all these truisms, especially the ones pertaining to farting.
:lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup:
Dec 15, 2015 10:23:25 #
Elwood wrote:
A big oops indeed. Lucky it wasn't wet. :shock: :lol: :lol:
That would have been me giving birth to a politician. :D
Dec 15, 2015 12:10:55 #
Big Bass wrote:
That would have been me giving birth to a politician. :D
:lol: :lol: Ugly thought. :twisted:
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