Husbands and wives
Nov 9, 2015 19:46:36 #
Going the e-mail rounds. :lol: :lol:
DO NOT MISS THE FINAL SALVO
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
King David
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Sasha Guitry
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Anonymous
The great question, which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"
Dumas
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Sigmund Freud
'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'
Red Skelton
'There's a way of t***sferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'
Sam Kinison
'I've had bad luck with both my wives.
The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
James Holt McGavra
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming.
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Patrick Murray
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....
Nash
You know what I did before I married?
Anything I wanted to.
Anonymous
My wife and I were happy for twenty years.
Then we met.
Henny Youngman
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Rodney Dangerfield
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
Anonymous
SEND THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH. AND TO THOSE LADIES WITH A SENSE OF HUMOR
DO NOT MISS THE FINAL SALVO
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
King David
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Sasha Guitry
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Anonymous
The great question, which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"
Dumas
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Sigmund Freud
'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'
Red Skelton
'There's a way of t***sferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'
Sam Kinison
'I've had bad luck with both my wives.
The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
James Holt McGavra
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming.
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Patrick Murray
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....
Nash
You know what I did before I married?
Anything I wanted to.
Anonymous
My wife and I were happy for twenty years.
Then we met.
Henny Youngman
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Rodney Dangerfield
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
Anonymous
SEND THIS TO ALL THE GUYS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD LAUGH. AND TO THOSE LADIES WITH A SENSE OF HUMOR
Nov 9, 2015 19:51:34 #
You're really asking for trouble. So am I when I forward it to some of my female friends. :shock:
Nov 9, 2015 19:52:37 #
Parrothead wrote:
You're really asking for trouble. So am I when I forward it to some of my female friends. :shock:
:lol: :lol: Oh well. It's fun living dangerously. :mrgreen:
Nov 9, 2015 20:07:26 #
Elwood wrote:
Going the e-mail rounds. :lol: :lol: br br br ... (show quote)
These are great. Thank you.
Nov 9, 2015 20:09:20 #
Elwood wrote:
Going the e-mail rounds. :lol: :lol: br br br ... (show quote)
I have found the answer! :twisted:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
Nov 9, 2015 20:24:35 #
archie bunker wrote:
I have found the answer! :twisted:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
I wish I had had your remote before my tormentor became an angel.
Nov 9, 2015 20:27:46 #
archie bunker wrote:
I have found the answer! :twisted:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
Arch, where can I get one of these?
Nov 9, 2015 20:34:02 #
Elwood wrote:
Going the e-mail rounds. :lol: :lol: br br br ... (show quote)
You really slighted Mr. Dangerfield with this list. Only one quote. Shame, shame on you. Here is my personal favorite from him.
" My wife's cooking is so bad that the flies in the back yard all pitched in to get the hole in the screen door fixed. "
Nov 9, 2015 20:45:31 #
PoppaGringo wrote:
I wish I had had your remote before my tormentor became an angel.
In all honesty, it doesn't really work very good. Damn Chinese crap! :lol:
Nov 9, 2015 20:46:16 #
son of witless wrote:
You really slighted Mr. Dangerfield with this list. Only one quote. Shame, shame on you. Here is my personal favorite from him.
" My wife's cooking is so bad that the flies in the back yard all pitched in to get the hole in the screen door fixed. "
" My wife's cooking is so bad that the flies in the back yard all pitched in to get the hole in the screen door fixed. "
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :thumbup:
Nov 9, 2015 20:50:32 #
archie bunker wrote:
In all honesty, it doesn't really work very good. Damn Chinese crap! :lol:
If you can perfect it you will be a multi millionaire overnight. :thumbup:
Nov 9, 2015 20:57:32 #
Rufus wrote:
If you can perfect it you will be a multi millionaire overnight. :thumbup:
Every man's dream, Rufus! :hunf:
Nov 9, 2015 21:01:19 #
archie bunker wrote:
Every man's dream, Rufus! :hunf:
:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: I guess we can still dream. I mean they can't take that away. Can they? I mean, can they?
Nov 9, 2015 21:15:25 #
Nov 9, 2015 21:16:32 #
archie bunker wrote:
I have found the answer! :twisted:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
Ain't technology great! :thumbup: :lol:
Damn, I want one of those. :lol: :lol:
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