$20
Aug 4, 2015 19:17:22 #
Been around a few times but still funny. :lol: :lol:
On their wedding night, the young bride
Approached her new husband and asked
For $20.00 for their first lovemaking
Encounter.
In his highly aroused state,
Her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made
Love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a
Cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that
She needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was
Surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.
During the next few minutes, he explained that
His employer was going through a process of corporate
Downsizing, and he had been let go.
It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find
Another position that paid anywhere near what
He'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.
Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which
Showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling
Nearly $1 million.
Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the
Bank which were worth over $2 million,
And informed him that they
Were one of the largest depositors in the bank.
She explained that for more than
Three decades she had 'charged' him for sex,
These holdings had multiplied and these were the
Results of her savings and investments.
Faced with evidence of cash and investments
Worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could
Barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,
'If I'd had any idea what you were doing,
I would have given you all my business!'
That's when she shot him.
You know, sometimes, men just don't know when
To keep their mouths shut!
Women are like phones:
They like to be held, talked to, and touched often
But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected!
On their wedding night, the young bride
Approached her new husband and asked
For $20.00 for their first lovemaking
Encounter.
In his highly aroused state,
Her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made
Love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a
Cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that
She needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was
Surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.
During the next few minutes, he explained that
His employer was going through a process of corporate
Downsizing, and he had been let go.
It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find
Another position that paid anywhere near what
He'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.
Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which
Showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling
Nearly $1 million.
Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the
Bank which were worth over $2 million,
And informed him that they
Were one of the largest depositors in the bank.
She explained that for more than
Three decades she had 'charged' him for sex,
These holdings had multiplied and these were the
Results of her savings and investments.
Faced with evidence of cash and investments
Worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could
Barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,
'If I'd had any idea what you were doing,
I would have given you all my business!'
That's when she shot him.
You know, sometimes, men just don't know when
To keep their mouths shut!
Women are like phones:
They like to be held, talked to, and touched often
But push the wrong button and your ass is disconnected!
Aug 4, 2015 20:01:49 #
How true. I learned very early to keep quiet when being lectured to by the good Dr. And afterwards.
Aug 4, 2015 21:32:17 #
Coos Bay Tom
Loc: coos bay oregon
Last night I went out drinkin' in my old Daddys Lincoln. --Wrecked the car and k**led my friend,---I screamed and I hollered--Cause he owed me $20 dollars and I know I'll never see-ee it again
Aug 4, 2015 22:23:19 #
Coos Bay Tom wrote:
Last night I went out drinkin' in my old Daddys Lincoln. --Wrecked the car and k**led my friend,---I screamed and I hollered--Cause he owed me $20 dollars and I know I'll never see-ee it again
Couldn't you sell his body, it should be worth something. Ask Planned Parenthood for their price list.
Aug 5, 2015 01:17:03 #
Coos Bay Tom
Loc: coos bay oregon
PoppaGringo wrote:
Ahh shoot shoulda thought of that before he was buried.Couldn't you sell his body, it should be worth something. Ask Planned Parenthood for their price list.
:XD: :cry:
Aug 5, 2015 01:18:46 #
Coos Bay Tom wrote:
Ahh shoot shoulda thought of that before he was buried.
:XD: :cry:
:XD: :cry:
Dig him up if the price is right. $20 dollars is $20 dollars.
Aug 5, 2015 01:27:44 #
Coos Bay Tom
Loc: coos bay oregon
PoppaGringo wrote:
I already have twenty dollars and I'm feeling kinda lazy.Dig him up if the price is right. $20 dollars is $20 dollars.
:lol: :lol:
Aug 5, 2015 01:31:23 #
Coos Bay Tom wrote:
I already have twenty dollars and I'm feeling kinda lazy.
:lol: :lol:
:lol: :lol:
Well, if you don't wish to rec**p the $20 dollars your friend owed prior to his demise, that is your decision.
Aug 5, 2015 05:58:09 #
Coos Bay Tom
Loc: coos bay oregon
PoppaGringo wrote:
I didn't expect him to die and I was waiting for his payday. Oh well I guess I could let him slide I just won't trust him again.Well, if you don't wish to rec**p the $20 dollars your friend owed prior to his demise, that is your decision.
:mrgreen:
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