Smilers All...
Apr 20, 2015 11:16:51 #
Don G. Dinsdale
Loc: El Cajon, CA (San Diego County)
Good Way To Start The Day... Don D.
These made me laugh, hope they do the same for you:
1. I'm not saying let's go k**l all the stupid people. I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out.
2. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. Others move out of the way much faster now.
3. You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. If they are holding a gun, she's probably angry.
4. Gone are the days when girls cooked like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.
5. You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone you've just met? That's common sense leaving your body.
6. I don't like making plans for the day. Because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown all around in the courtroom.
7. I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes about 1,500 days in a row.
8. I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Gym this morning.
9. Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers... If you find one, what's your plan?
10. Everyone has a right to be stupid. Politicians just abuse the privilege.
WOW!!
I asked a Chinese girl for her phone number. She replied, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"
I said, "Wow!"
But her friend ruined it and told me, "She means 666-3629"
These made me laugh, hope they do the same for you:
1. I'm not saying let's go k**l all the stupid people. I'm just saying let's remove all the warning labels and let the problem work itself out.
2. I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. Others move out of the way much faster now.
3. You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. If they are holding a gun, she's probably angry.
4. Gone are the days when girls cooked like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.
5. You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone you've just met? That's common sense leaving your body.
6. I don't like making plans for the day. Because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown all around in the courtroom.
7. I didn't make it to the gym today. That makes about 1,500 days in a row.
8. I decided to change calling the bathroom the John and renamed it the Jim. I feel so much better saying I went to the Gym this morning.
9. Dear paranoid people who check behind shower curtains for murderers... If you find one, what's your plan?
10. Everyone has a right to be stupid. Politicians just abuse the privilege.
WOW!!
I asked a Chinese girl for her phone number. She replied, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"
I said, "Wow!"
But her friend ruined it and told me, "She means 666-3629"
Apr 20, 2015 11:49:44 #
Apr 20, 2015 12:51:25 #
LAPhil
Loc: Los Angeles, CA
Don G. Dinsdale wrote:
Those are great! Where did you get them?Good Way To Start The Day... Don D. br br br The... (show quote)
Apr 20, 2015 13:34:23 #
Don G. Dinsdale
Loc: El Cajon, CA (San Diego County)
LAPhil wrote:
Those are great! Where did you get them?
~~~~~~~~~~~
An on line lady friend sent them...
Apr 20, 2015 14:38:59 #
Don G. Dinsdale wrote:
~~~~~~~~~~~
An on line lady friend sent them...
An on line lady friend sent them...
Thank you Don. It is refreshing to start the day with laughter.
Apr 21, 2015 05:56:14 #
Alicia
Loc: NYC
WORLD'S SHORTEST FAIRY TALE
Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy, "Will you marry me?"
The guy said, "NO!"
And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, drinking, always had a clean house, never had to cook, and never had a headache
THE END
Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy, "Will you marry me?"
The guy said, "NO!"
And the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, dancing, drinking, always had a clean house, never had to cook, and never had a headache
THE END
Apr 21, 2015 21:22:18 #
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