Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, 'Cheers'.
“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”
“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”
“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol k**ls brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”
“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”
“Ah, just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they're accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”
“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”
“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”
They did a study between postal workers and chimpanzees. They proved chimps were 32% slower. Of course, they were better at public relations.”
‘A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it’s the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are k**led first.”
“An interesting article here. It says humans only use 17% of their brain. Boy, you realize what that means? We don’t use a full, ah……64%.”
“You wanna see the dark side? You oughta see Ma when you leave the shower curtain outside the tub.”
slatten49 wrote:
Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, 'Cheers'.
“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”
“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”
“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol k**ls brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”
“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”
“Ah, just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they're accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”
“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”
“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”
They did a study between postal workers and chimpanzees. They proved chimps were 32% slower. Of course, they were better at public relations.”
‘A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. When the herd is hunted, it’s the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are k**led first.”
“An interesting article here. It says humans only use 17% of their brain. Boy, you realize what that means? We don’t use a full, ah……64%.”
“You wanna see the dark side? You oughta see Ma when you leave the shower curtain outside the tub.”
Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Clif... (
show quote)
Working for the Postal Service will do this to a sane person's mind.
archie bunker wrote:
Working for the Postal Service will do this to a sane person's mind.
We can safely assume you would know
Hum! I thought "to serve man" ( a service), as the SF story said, meant for the advanced society to quarter, clean up, cook and eat man. But, in counterpoise, to serve, that is service, women was meant to increase the population, as in "be fruitful and multiply." I remain confused.
manning5me wrote:
Hum! I thought "to serve man" ( a service), as the SF story said, meant for the advanced society to quarter, clean up, cook and eat man. But, in counterpoise, to serve, that is service, women was meant to increase the population, as in "be fruitful and multiply." I remain confused.
It is a little confusing, this language we speak.
Mrs. Bunker took her car in for "service" on Thursday, and, it wasn't shot at, bitten by a dog, or anything. Matter of fact, it came back with new oil, filters, even the cab one. (Never knew there was such a thing) It had clean glass, and was vacuumed out real well.
I'm kinda hoping it's pregnant, and will give birth to a new one, since it was "serviced". I hope so, since it cost nine thousand dollars for them to put it on the lift, another five thousand for them to look in their toolbox to find the correct socket to strip the oil drain plug, and then, another eleven million dollars for the five quarts of synthetic oil that was imported from a galaxy one hundred million light years away.
archie bunker wrote:
It is a little confusing, this language we speak.
Mrs. Bunker took her car in for "service" on Thursday, and, it wasn't shot at, bitten by a dog, or anything. Matter of fact, it came back with new oil, filters, even the cab one. (Never knew there was such a thing) It had clean glass, and was vacuumed out real well.
I'm kinda hoping it's pregnant, and will give birth to a new one, since it was "serviced". I hope so, since it cost nine thousand dollars for them to put it on the lift, another five thousand for them to look in their toolbox to find the correct socket to strip the oil drain plug, and then, another eleven million dollars for the five quarts of synthetic oil that was imported from a galaxy one hundred million light years away.
It is a little confusing, this language we speak. ... (
show quote)
============
Gee, tell me where you had such good service! It sucks around here!
manning5me wrote:
============
Gee, tell me where you had such good service! It sucks around here!
What, they don't vacuum your car, and clean their oily handprints off of your steering wheel?
Dang, that's just part of getting "serviced" here in Texas. They clean you up when they're done "servicing" you.
It's the polite thing to do, after all...
archie bunker wrote:
What, they don't vacuum your car, and clean their oily handprints off of your steering wheel?
Dang, that's just part of getting "serviced" here in Texas. They clean you up when they're done "servicing" you.
It's the polite thing to do, after all...
=============
I guess I'll have to grant you Texas is different, even in the service area. Maybe especially in servicing...
manning5me wrote:
Hum! I thought "to serve man" ( a service), as the SF story said, meant for the advanced society to quarter, clean up, cook and eat man. But, in counterpoise, to serve, that is service, women was meant to increase the population, as in "be fruitful and multiply." I remain confused.
To Serve Man was also a Twilight Zone show. Here is a way to watch it again.
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x80j7it
If you want to reply, then
register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.