manning5 Loc: Richmond, VA

So, I am old now! I claim the right to tell it as I see it! The following phrases today annoy, grate on my ear, and sometimes enrage me: perhaps you too!

#1 That's what I'm talking about!

#2 Sounds like a plan!

#3 Wh**ever!

#4 No problem

#5 I knew you'd say that!

#6 You have reached an automated system...

#7 I did not understand you.

#8 Please hold!

#9 Please leave your name and number and we'll get back to you.

#10 I h**e to tell you this, but...

#11 It is what it is.

#12 Come on Man!

#13 Where's it at?

#14 Enjoy your day! Or, Have a nice day!

#15 What will be will be! (Que sera, sera!)

#16 Take care!

#17 LOL!

#18 If the shoe fits wear it!

#19 Hold on there, Jellybean!

#20 You are too big for your britches!

#21 Who said life had to be fair?

#22 I wish I had a dime for every time I...

#23 What's up?

#24 Have a good one!

#25 Life is not a bowl of cherries!

#26 You are free to go!

#27 Free offer.

#28 I have good news and bad news!

#29 Just wait till your father gets home!

#30 You are cruising for a bruising!

#31 Mi casa su casa!

#32 I told you so!

#33 This is not my first rodeo!

#34 I'm sorry...

#35 We take cash only, no cards or checks.

#36 Good morning, Sunshine!

#37 You are doing 50 in a 35 zone!

#38 I thought you knew that...

#39 For the last time...

#40 If it moves, salute it! If it doesn't move, paint it!

#41 Who do you think you are?

#42 Aw! Get out!

#43 If I had only known!

#44 You're full of it!

#45 That's the last straw!

#46 What would you say if I...

#47 Dream on, Jackson!

#48 That's a bunch of crap!

#49 Get real!

#50 How can I help you?

#51 Please leave your name and number and I will get back to you!

#52 I swear on a stack of Bibles!

#53 I'm a meat and potatoes man.

#54 Cross my heart and hope to die!

#55 Not my job!

#56 Go suck an egg!

#57 Is that really you?

#58 Just doing my job.

#59 License and registration please!

#60 Going to a fire?

#61 Assume the position! (No, I am not a jailbird!)

#62 Take two aspirin and call me tomorrow.

#63 Did you take out the trash?

#64 Have you seen how high your front lawn is?

#65 Isn't life beautiful?

#66 Better than the alternative!

$67 Say what?

#68 You don't look your age!

#69 You and what army?

#70 Sit down!

#71 I swear on my mother's grave!

#72 It is tit for tat!

#73 This is where it's at!

#74 Are you trying to be a comic?

#75 I had a really nice time!

#76 Your engine light is on!

#77 So, here's your bill...

#78 You have insufficient funds for this t***saction.

#79 I'll pay you tomorrow.

#80 You can stew in your own juice!

#81 Man alive you're half dead!

#82 You've got that bass ackward!

#83 Money talks!

#84 I give up!

#85 What's more important to you...

#86 What are you, a...

#87 Your flight is delayed!

#88 We have a minor problem, so we are landing in _____, not Denver.

#89 This is a hijack! Keep seated or else!

#90 This is your Captain: It will be a bit bumpy for a few minutes...

#91 This is your Captain again: be reassured that we can fly quite well on one engine.

#92 There's nothing to worry about!

#93 Flight Attendants: prepare for a water landing.

#94 If the shoe fits...

#95 Its six of one and a half dozen of the other.

#96 It takes two to tango!

#97 Ginger Rogers did it all backwards and in high heels!

#98 Sure you can! Not!

#99 This store is closed!

#100 We're off! Honey, did you check the stove?

This is the last one, I promise! Oh!

#101 I promise!

#102 Press 1 for English.

#103 You must...

#104 Show me what you've got!

#105 My Mom didn't raise any fools!

#106 What do you think this is, Christmas?

#107 Fine and Dandy!

#108 The next appointment time is in three months.

#109 We charge $50 for no-shows.

#110 I am between a rock and a hard place!

#111 Heads I win, tails you lose!

#112 I don't care!

#113 It's your turn...

#114 I'm sorry, we closed 2 minutes ago!

#115 That item is not returnable.

#116 Heavens to Betsy!

#111 Gee willikers!

#112 Gosh Almighty!

#113 It's a crap shoot!

#114 Brilliant!

#115 That's so common!

#116 One size fits all.

#117 You show me yours and I'll show you mine! (Not that!)

#118 I'm making you an offer you can't refuse!

#119 Your membership will automatically renew every month.

#120 A miss is as good as a mile.

#122 Fess up!

#123 FU!

#124 Them's fightin words!

#125 I swear on my mother's grave!

#126 You ain't worth s**t!

#127 Better late than never!

#128 You know the saying...

#129 Avalanche!

#130 Don't forget to duck!

#131 Fire!

#132 Incoming!

#133 When the boss is away...

#134 Waste not want not!

#135 ...Pilgrim!

#136 You mean I busted my ass for nothing?

#137 It's time you grew up!

#138 It takes a real man to...

#139 You're k*****g me!

#140 You always end us up in a dead end!

#141 Look out!

#142 Head's up!

#143 Timber!

#144 That was close!

#145 What i***t thought this up?

#146 Let's try it one more time.

#147 You broke it!

#148 The battery is dead!

#149 You have a flat tire!

#150 Do we have enough gas?

#151 Your license is out of date!

#152 Pull over!

#153 There's a hurricane warning for Thursday!

#154 You did what?

#155 That's a ticking time bomb!

#156 Hit the dirt!

#157 Better safe than sorry!

#158 See if I care!

#159 You are dead wrong!

#160 A penny for your thoughts.

#161 You are in deep water!

#162 Look at you!

#163 It's tax time, Hun!

#164 That deduction is not allowed!

#165 You are right as rain.

#166 Can I get some peace and quiet in here!

#167 Will you accept the charges?

#168 Time wounds all heels!

#169 You're not mad, are you?

#170 Can you lend me $500?

#171 Listen up!

#172 I'm from the government...

#173 My show is on now, Hun.

#174 That's crazy!

$175 You want fries with that?

#176 If I were king...

#177 Your time is up!

#178 Answer the question!

#179 Rome wasn't built in a day.

#180 History repeats itself!

#181 I don't give a damn!

#182 It's not worth a penny!

#183 I made it all by myself!

#184 How are you doing?

#185 What kind of nut are you anyway?

#186 You only have one life to live!

#187 Otherwise, I want a divorce!

#188 You need to go to the doctor!

#189 From now on no sodium, right?

#190 Carbonated drinks are not good for you.

#191 Take your medicine.

#192 You are 24 pounds overweight.

#193 You must not drink alcohol.

#194 My best friend is my dog.

#195 Time, gentlemen, time!

#196 The Bible says...

#197 You need the right tool for that job.

#198 I just waxed that floor, dummy!

#199 You are going beyond the pale there!

#200 That is enough!

And so it is!

Peaver Bogart Loc: Montana

I always say #7 to the customer service people of any company I try to call, and then I get pissed off and say to myself (well, F me a runnin').