bahmer

Peewee and The Perfect Man

A man Peewee walks out to the street and stops a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Peewee: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman... he was a cabbie who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, he was always in the right place at the right time. Things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Peewee: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star. And you should have heard him play the piano! He was an amazing guy, perfect in every way."
Peewee: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat them with. And he could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street b****s out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right, he never made a mistake, he was perfect!!"

Peewee: "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good.

He was the best lover in bed, and could take his wife to the top of the mountain. He would never answer her back, even if she was in the wrong. His clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Peewee: "This Frank Feldman was an amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well... I never actually met Frank. He died, and I have the pleasure of being married to his widow."

badbobby Loc: texas

goodun bahm

bahmer

Now we know why Peewee was married so many times.

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

Ya'lls just making stuff up now. My theory is they's either for me or agin me. If they're agin me I toss em back so they can find another man they kin mold into their idea of the perfect man.

Cuz they ain't no perfect man and there ain't no perfect woman. The only perfect man never got married. Iffin He did, He would have been no better than dem fallen angels guys.

Some ladies just want to work on the man's flaws and never their own. Taint right and sure ain't prudent. Adam didn't bite the fruit until after Eve. He didn't think he could live without her. Bet God would have made him another woman. It would have cost another rib but he had the top surgeon doing it. But that's water under the bridge now. And the clock only runs in one direction. No repeats and no do-overs.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

...and, that sums up why you remain a 'Bird-Dog'.

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

It is cheaper to keep her but I would have had to turn in my man card or become a eunuch. I've castrated calves, no thanks.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

I guess I got lucky with The Sgt. Major taking me in..

Her....not so much.

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

At least you honest... sometimes.

Must be the Worm moon?

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

She definitely married down.

You've got me baffled with the "Worm moon" comment, PeeWee. What is that

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

It's when the Moon is closet to the Earth, It means winter is over and the worms start coming out due to the

ground thawing and wet soil. They have to have air and they don't want to drown. Ask BB, bet he knows the

best time to find worms is after a heavy rain. Guess that Hank Jr. song wasn't about you.

https://youtu.be/3cQNkIrg-Tk

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

Thanks I am a wiser man due to this information, PeeWee.

bahmer

Most fishermen and kids that used to sell worms for fishing know that Slats.

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

Hey, we all pitch in when we can. You know RVs, BB knows fishing, I know horses, and I'm not sure what Bahm knows.

Sorry, Bahm, your name was on the calendar for today.

bahmer

And your name goes back on the calendar as soon as finish typing this.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

I was just unfamiliar with the term "Worm moon." Besides, I'm not much of a fisherman.