Classic Comments on The French

"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.
France has usually been governed by prostitutes." —Mark Twain.

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
—General George S. Patton.

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion."
—Norman Schwartzkopf

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."
—Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure."
—Jacques Chirac, President of France
"As far as France is concerned, you're right." —Rush Limbaugh,

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee."
—Regis Philbin.

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens
of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than
sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whisky I don't know." -P.J O'Rourke (1989).

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine
out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it."
—John McCain, U.S. Senator

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein?
Because he h**es America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret.
He is French, people."
—Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq.
After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of France either"
—Jay Leno.

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof it came marching into Paris under a German f**g."
—David Letterman

"Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
—Ted Nugent.

"War without France would be like ... uh... World War II."

"The favorite bumper sticker in Washington D.C. right now is one that says
'First Iraq, then France.'"
—Tom Brokaw.

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against
Disney World and Big Macs than the N**is?"
—Dennis Miller.

"It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us."
—Alan Kent

"They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman
is urged to keep duct tape, a white f**g, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house."
—Argus Hamilton

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day
— the description was, "Never shot. Dropped once'."
-Rep. Roy Blount (MO)

"The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found truffles in Iraq."
-Dennis Miller

Q. What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII?
A. Table for 100,000 m'sieur?

"Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris?
It's not known, it's never been tried."
—Rep. Roy Blount (MO)

"Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII?
And that's because it was raining."
—John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv.

The AP and UPI reported that the French Government announced after the London bombings
that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide. The only two higher levels in France
are Surrender and Collaborate. The rise in the alert level was precipitated by a recent fire which
destroyed France's white f**g factory, effectively disabling their military.

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney - (AP),
Paris, March 5, 2003 The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the
use of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at
the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army
garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.

Classic Comments on The French

"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country.
France has usually been governed by prostitutes." —Mark Twain.

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me."
—General George S. Patton.

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion."
—Norman Schwartzkopf

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it."
—Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure."
—Jacques Chirac, President of France
"As far as France is concerned, you're right." —Rush Limbaugh,

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee."
—Regis Philbin.

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens
of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than
sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whisky I don't know." -P.J O'Rourke (1989).

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine
out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it."
—John McCain, U.S. Senator

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein?
Because he h**es America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret.
He is French, people."
—Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq.
After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of France either"
—Jay Leno.

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof it came marching into Paris under a German f**g."
—David Letterman

"Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
—Ted Nugent.

"War without France would be like ... uh... World War II."

"The favorite bumper sticker in Washington D.C. right now is one that says
'First Iraq, then France.'"
—Tom Brokaw.

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against
Disney World and Big Macs than the N**is?"
—Dennis Miller.

"It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us."
—Alan Kent

"They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman
is urged to keep duct tape, a white f**g, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house."
—Argus Hamilton

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day
— the description was, "Never shot. Dropped once'."
-Rep. Roy Blount (MO)

"The French will only agree to go to war when we've proven we've found truffles in Iraq."
-Dennis Miller

Q. What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII?
A. Table for 100,000 m'sieur?

"Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris?
It's not known, it's never been tried."
—Rep. Roy Blount (MO)

"Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII?
And that's because it was raining."
—John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv.

The AP and UPI reported that the French Government announced after the London bombings
that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide. The only two higher levels in France
are Surrender and Collaborate. The rise in the alert level was precipitated by a recent fire which
destroyed France's white f**g factory, effectively disabling their military.

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney - (AP),
Paris, March 5, 2003 The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the
use of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks displayance at
the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army
garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.

Every time we've turned around, the French have had to stick it to us. We should have invaded & continued north through Italy into Austria & Germany or Germany directly rather than going through France. We could also have gone north through Greece, the soft under-belly of Europe as Churchill wanted to & put it but FDR promised eastern Europe to Stalin at Tehran.

If Hitler had kept France it might have been better for us in the long run. DeGaulle (le Grande Charles) was useless as an ally. When we hit Libya,
France wouldn't let us go over their airspace & after what we did for them. And they did things like that several times.

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I will not visit France ---nor any other Muslim country!!