pafret Loc: Northeast

Trump Finally Unveils SCOTUS Nominee: Alex Jones

Before you get your panties all twisted up, know that this is satire!



WASHINGTON, D.C.—Amid breathless anticipation for the president’s second pick to the Supreme Court of the United States, President Trump spilled the beans on Twitter Monday afternoon that he had selected conspiracy theorist and talk show host Alex Jones as his nominee for the nation’s highest court.

Trump quickly called a press conference at which he introduced his nominee.

“I like the stuff he says on his show. Good stuff. The best stuff, really,” Trump said. “Whereas all the other candidates for the Supreme Court were heavily involved in the Deep State New World Order, Alex Jones sees right through all the lies. In a world of f**e news, Alex cuts through all the BS to bring us the unvarnished t***h about UFOs, weather control, and the reptilian plot to o*******w our plane of existence.”

“This guy is the real deal,” he added, before bringing out Jones in a judge’s robe.

Jones then addressed the reporters gathered, beginning a long rant about lizard people taking over the highest levels of our government in order to turn frogs gay with chemicals in the water supply. He was then asked to stop selling Caveman Supplements to members of the press and had to be restrained and tranquilized.

bmac32 Loc: West Florida

I lean right and even I'd be saying hell no and Thank God this in nothing more than a pipe dream.

Fit2BTied Loc: Texas

I admit that I need to filter things when I watch InfoWorld or Prison Planet reports - BUT I wish I had a dollar for every time they presented something and we later found out they were spot on or at least near the bullseye. I like to think of Alex as the alter ego of most CNN "news-people" - although I prefer nearly everything else they present to listening to AJ directly. I think he's been overdosing on the Brain Force.

Yes, Alex Jones as SCOTUS would be nightmarish, but he and his minions are an important facet of the information tsunami I choose to hold my nose and wade through every day in order to stay informed.

Peewee Loc: San Antonio, TX

Ditto for me, can't stand his voice and showmanship, but he hits the bullseye from time to time. Just not sure who he is working for. I think it's Alex Jones.