Terrible Headaches...
I Know This Story Has Been Around Before, I Mean Before Computers Even, I Remember My Dad Telling This Story When I Was a Little Kid, However It's a True Story I'm Told... Don D.
WARNING - Always, Make Sure You Consult The Right Expert!
As Joe got older he was increasingly hampered by terrible headaches. When his career and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally found an old country doctor who solved the problem.
"The good news is that I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a rare medical condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine and the pressure causes one hell of a headache. The pressure can be relieved by removing your testicles."
Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years. As he walked down the street, he felt like a new person and decided to make a new beginning and start a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought: "that's what I need...a new suit.
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...size 42 long." Joe laughed, "That's right. How did you know?" The tailor said: "Been in the business 60 years."
Joe tried on the suit and it fit perfectly. As he admired himself in the mirror, the salesman said, "How about a new shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 inch sleeves and 16 1/2 inch neck." Joe was surprised: "That's right. How did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years" Joe tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "how about some new shoes?" Joe was on a roll and said, "Sure/"
The salesman eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see... 10/ 1/2 E." Joe said, astonished: "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years." Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see...size 36."
Joe laughed. "Aha! I got you.! I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman said, "You can't wear a size 34. It will press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
Don G. Dinsdale wrote:
I Know This Story Has Been Around Before, I Mean Before Computers Even, I Remember My Dad Telling This Story When I Was a Little Kid, However It's a True Story I'm Told... Don D.
WARNING - Always, Make Sure You Consult The Right Expert!
As Joe got older he was increasingly hampered by terrible headaches. When his career and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally found an old country doctor who solved the problem.
"The good news is that I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a rare medical condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine and the pressure causes one hell of a headache. The pressure can be relieved by removing your testicles."
Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years. As he walked down the street, he felt like a new person and decided to make a new beginning and start a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought: "that's what I need...a new suit.
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...size 42 long." Joe laughed, "That's right. How did you know?" The tailor said: "Been in the business 60 years."
Joe tried on the suit and it fit perfectly. As he admired himself in the mirror, the salesman said, "How about a new shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 inch sleeves and 16 1/2 inch neck." Joe was surprised: "That's right. How did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years" Joe tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "how about some new shoes?" Joe was on a roll and said, "Sure/"
The salesman eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see... 10/ 1/2 E." Joe said, astonished: "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years." Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see...size 36."
Joe laughed. "Aha! I got you.! I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman said, "You can't wear a size 34. It will press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
I Know This Story Has Been Around Before, I Mean B... (
show quote)
Oh no! A day late and a dollar short. ha, ha, ha, ha
Semper Fi
Don G. Dinsdale wrote:
I Know This Story Has Been Around Before, I Mean Before Computers Even, I Remember My Dad Telling This Story When I Was a Little Kid, However It's a True Story I'm Told... Don D.
WARNING - Always, Make Sure You Consult The Right Expert!
As Joe got older he was increasingly hampered by terrible headaches. When his career and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally found an old country doctor who solved the problem.
"The good news is that I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a rare medical condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine and the pressure causes one hell of a headache. The pressure can be relieved by removing your testicles."
Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years. As he walked down the street, he felt like a new person and decided to make a new beginning and start a new life. He saw a men's clothing store and thought: "that's what I need...a new suit.
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see...size 42 long." Joe laughed, "That's right. How did you know?" The tailor said: "Been in the business 60 years."
Joe tried on the suit and it fit perfectly. As he admired himself in the mirror, the salesman said, "How about a new shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see, 34 inch sleeves and 16 1/2 inch neck." Joe was surprised: "That's right. How did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years" Joe tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "how about some new shoes?" Joe was on a roll and said, "Sure/"
The salesman eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see... 10/ 1/2 E." Joe said, astonished: "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 60 years." Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a moment and said, "Sure." The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see...size 36."
Joe laughed. "Aha! I got you.! I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman said, "You can't wear a size 34. It will press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
I Know This Story Has Been Around Before, I Mean B... (
show quote)
You are right about the antiquity of this joke. A recent book, "The Travels of Marco Polo", based on his journals from 1271 AD had a variant of this story. His Uncle had a life ending medical condition, which had only one known cure and that cure, xyz, caused chemical castration. He accepted the treatment. When he reached Kublai Kahn's court, those physicians told them of another cure and said if you take xyz it will cause impotence. Essentially the same story from the thirteenth century.
Learn New Info Everyday If You Listen, Thanks... Don D.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
pafret wrote:
You are right about the antiquity of this joke. A recent book, "The Travels of Marco Polo", based on his journals from 1271 AD had a variant of this story. His Uncle had a life ending medical condition, which had only one known cure and that cure, xyz, caused chemical castration. He accepted the treatment. When he reached Kublai Kahn's court, those physicians told them of another cure and said if you take xyz it will cause impotence. Essentially the same story from the thirteenth century.
You are right about the antiquity of this joke. A... (
show quote)
AND,your honor,Thats why I SHOT THE DOCTOR.......
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