Versies, contra and otherwise: "you really messed up this time". Why do we only talk about those that mess up, why don't we even mention those that mess down? I guess our glass is...

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

"you really messed up this time". Why do we only talk about those that mess up, why don't we even mention those that mess down? I guess our glass is always half empty.

"you scared the living daylights out of me!". What are living daylights? Are there dead daylights? Are there living night lights? If you lose your daylights, does it come back? Is there a v*****e for your daylights? Can your daylights come out any way other than being scared out?

"I'm going to beat you half to death". How do you measure a beating, to know when you've reached the halfway point? Are you a liar, if you only beat someone 1/4 to death? I remember as a child, being sure my Dad beat me at least 7/8 or 3/4 to death - and hoping like hell he was keeping careful track of how far he was beating me.

archie bunker Loc: Texas

lpnmajor wrote:

"you really messed up this time". Why do... (show quote)

I was always beaten within an inch of my life. How do you measure that?
I've also been slapped right out from under my hair more times than I can count. I was also threatened with being rendered unable to chew soup.

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

lpnmajor wrote:

"you really messed up this time". Why do... (show quote)

Hyperbole, perhaps

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

archie bunker wrote:

I was always beaten within an inch of my life. How do you measure that?
I've also been slapped right out from under my hair more times than I can count. I was also threatened with being rendered unable to chew soup.

One has to assume that there is a tool for measuring a beating, but I have never discovered where to find such a device, and my Father will not reveal the secret. I even asked him for this information on the premise that he was putting his Grandchildren at risk, since without the device - I might beat one of them a smidgen too far. He still wouldn't budge.

To deepen this mystery, Mothers have their own beating tools; my Mother threatened to slap me clean into next week frequently. I suppose this proves that Mother have superior science/technology............my Father threatened me with a near death experience - my Mother threatened me with time travel. BTW, Mothers also have extra sensory perception; not only do they know what you've done from miles away, they know your intentions - I intentionally sought a slapping, hoping to get my Mother to send me into the future.....................to avoid a test I didn't study for. She never fell for the ruse - she slapped me into the next room instead.

archie bunker Loc: Texas

lpnmajor wrote:

One has to assume that there is a tool for measuri... (show quote)

My mother apparently learned to drive with one had on the wheei, and the other flailing in the back seat.

They didn't teach me that in drivers ed. I learned it on my own.
Also, I never beat my kids like a rented mule since I've never rented a mule, and am not quite sure how to beat one.
I tried my dad's idea of thumping knots on their heads faster than they could rub em, but never really mastered it.

badbobby Loc: texas

lpnmajor wrote:

"you really messed up this time". Why do... (show quote)

just wondrin Doc
have you seen your shrink yet?
If not ,please proceed there immediately
perhaps he(she)can help you

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

badbobby wrote:

just wondrin Doc
have you seen your shrink yet?
If not ,please proceed there immediately
perhaps he(she)can help you

Have you thought of sharing your shrink's phone number with Doc, so's he can seek such required 'help?'

Or, has your shrink got his/her hands full in dealing with your insanity

badbobby Loc: texas

slatten49 wrote:

Have you thought of sharing your shrink's phone number with Doc, so's he can seek such required 'help?'

Or, has your shrink got his/her hands full in dealing with your insanity

I'm glad that Doc has a champion
I h**e to see anyone go through life without proper direction(or proper time)
I'm sure you mean well in your defense of Doc
but he would be much better off with the help of a fellow Navy man
than depending on the services of a dastardly Marine

slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

badbobby wrote:

I'm glad that Doc has a champion
I h**e to see anyone go through life without proper direction(or proper time)
I'm sure you mean well in your defense of Doc
but he would be much better off with the help of a fellow Navy man
than depending on the services of a dastardly Marine

Well, Doc was always a Marine 'wannabee,' but fate did not treat him so kindly, so...as a result, he ended up in the Navy. In a stroke of luck, he was then fortunate enough to become a Navy Corpsman, thus serving to his heart's content by tending to his lifelong heros...U.S. Marines. As they say...all's well that ends well.

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

badbobby wrote:

just wondrin Doc
have you seen your shrink yet?
If not ,please proceed there immediately
perhaps he(she)can help you

Of course I've seen a shrink, more than one in fact. I've worked with a few, slept with one or two.....

How do you think I developed my keen insight into the inherent insanity, that we call modern civilization?

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

archie bunker wrote:

My mother apparently learned to drive with one had on the wheei, and the other flailing in the back seat.

They didn't teach me that in drivers ed. I learned it on my own.
Also, I never beat my kids like a rented mule since I've never rented a mule, and am not quite sure how to beat one.
I tried my dad's idea of thumping knots on their heads faster than they could rub em, but never really mastered it.

Yeah, I never beat my kids either, I developed an aversion to beating for some reason. I did, however, blister their butts on occasion, thumped some sense into them, and smacked some silly looks off their faces. In hind sight, I should have done more thumping and smacking, but there ain't no do-overs. I did manage to blister the need to beat someone out of them, so my Grandchildren appreciate that.

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

slatten49 wrote:

Well, Doc was always a Marine 'wannabee,' but fate did not treat him so kindly, so...as a result, he ended up in the Navy. In a stroke of luck, he was then fortunate enough to become a Navy Corpsman, thus serving to his heart's content by tending to his lifelong heros...U.S. Marines. As they say...all's well that ends well.

Haha! I found out that successful Marine's have a few loose screws. One may show up at MCRD with all their screws tight, but the DS's will soon loosen the appropriate screws, which, when pointed in the proper direction, makes a near unstoppable object. That's Marine Corp physics - Marine's don't know when to quit, This sometimes causes some, um, small, ah, problems, in peace time, requiring the services of the nearest Gunnery Sergeant.

teabag09

My Dad retired at twenty but was reinducted to program him for civilian life. Ended up retiring at twenty six. Mike

lpnmajor wrote:

Haha! I found out that successful Marine's have a ... (show quote)

badbobby Loc: texas

lpnmajor wrote:

Of course I've seen a shrink, more than one in fact. I've worked with a few, slept with one or two.....

How do you think I developed my keen insight into the inherent insanity, that we call modern civilization?

slept with one or two?
would you care to share the vital statistics of those two?
I have also been told to seek help

badbobby Loc: texas

lpnmajor wrote:

One has to assume that there is a tool for measuri... (show quote)

well Arch
looks to me that your parents knew the proper ways to keep you out of dire trouble
My parents never laid a hand on me
The old mans razor strop served quite nicely