banjojack wrote:
When and where I grew up, Single parent families, (except in the case of the death of one spouse,) were quite rare. My high school had a 90plus percent graduation rate. Most of the dropouts were from single parent homes, for reasons other than a deceased parent. Most (not all) of the kids who got in trouble legally were from single parent homes. I did not know there was such a thing as food stamps. (I don't think there was ). Welfare was something for people in Los Angeles, or New York, or maybe Albequerque. Stability requires a certain level of income, sure, but it also requires parents who discipline their kids. I read somewhere, and I tend to agree, that the average high school graduate today has what would have been considered a 7th Grade Education when I graduated. The difference? Discipline and love in the home. Parents who were involved. Teachers were expected to teach, and students were expected to learn, or the parents would know the reasons why it wasn't happening. EVERYBODY was in the PTA. Parents and teachers knew each other.
When and where I grew up, Single parent families, ... (
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Yep, that is how I was raised... discipline and my parents were involved with my education. I recall that was the norm for a stable family in the bedroom community I grew up in. But wow how things have changed.
When I was a child, I never gave it a thought that all my family and neighbors went to the same Christian church every Sunday. Fathers were the bread winners driving to their jobs in American made automobiles like General Motors, Ford, or a Chrysler. Mothers stayed home making meals from scratch and watching their children while dad was at work. After finishing our chores, our family huddled guardedly close to small CRT T.V. screens to see a few shows; Hogan's Heroes, The Andy Griffith Show, McHale's Navy, Gilligan's Island, the Beverly Hillbillies, and the Ed Sullivan show and the news.
In my home town back in 1964, it had only one stop light on a three mile long, two lane road mostly surrounded by farm fields. Everyone you knew shopped at an Alpha- Beta grocery store and Sprouse-Reitz five-and-dime store. My family moved into one of the first track homes with sidewalks in the town. My brother and I would play with a neighbor kid on his parents 40 acre citrus farm near our home. Friday night High School football was our best entertainment and the players were like celebrities who broke our youthful boredom. Most teens and young adults back then dreamed of leaving town but didnt.
Fast forward 50 years later and my home town has become a city. Its past family life style and landscape are nearly unrecognizable compared to how it used to be. Track homes have replaced most farm land. While Asian tourist buses regularly come to our bustling Disney Land like Outlet stores, many locals shop at a K-mart, a Wall-mart, and a Target, and at least 18 grocery stores.
It is normal for both parents to rush to work in their sleek, late model, foreign automobiles, negotiating their way to work through a busy eight lane freeway and streets that are jammed during work days. There are dozens of established Christian churches that offer private preschool and elementary school to accommodate a two income household or single working parent.
Many young kids dont watch or play football, theyre playing soccer! Many moms and dads are packing their kids into their SUVs, vans or trucks, shuttling them off to different games all weekend. In between games, kids are in the back of their parents automobile posting on Facebook or Twitter, playing video games or watching Netflix or Amazon videos on smart phones or tablets. Families often go to one of two large multiplex movie theaters with 3D or imax movies and THX sound. Both have a foyer where they serve supersized food and drinks. Many older kids have moved away to college or go to work in another state or even a foreign country.
Estimated median household income in my home town in 1965 was $6,900. Today its over $78,669. Many people I know make much more. Most could barely afford their brand new home for $25,000 in 1968. Today many homes are valued at over $450,000. Many Adults in my age group are divorce or remarried and remake their lives again after the children grow up and move out of the house.
My kids and friends cant imagine growing up like their parents and grandparents did. They love their busy lives and the endless choices that their dynamic lifestyle allows them. I feel at times a generational/cultural divide between my kids and myself, but they keep in touch with me regularly by phone or Skype even if they are across the U.S. or staying in another country. My father passed away five years ago and family keeps a watchful eye on my mother who still likes to travel. For my children, a stable family is more about a state of mind than the stereo typical structure or lifestyle I grew up with.
My kids faith in God is strong and they are passing on their own beliefs in God to their kids as they have come to understand him through a church of their choice. This I believe helps them through the bumps in the road of life we all experience.
I expect a lot of good will come in the future for all our kids as life advances and changes. I think a few words from an old song from my generation says it best.
I hear babies cry, I watch them grow, they'll learn much more, than I'll ever know. And I think to myself, What a wonderful world.. - words and music by Bob Thiele and George David Weiss and sung by Louis Armstrong.
P.S. I am now like my dad, I ramble on about the past and my kids.