permafrost Loc: Minnesota

Can not help but laugh at this one.. Courtesy of a buddy in Wyoming, or Montana or wherever he maybe today

The Atheist and The Bear
An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals", he said to himself.
As he continued walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes. Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot Bear charging towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. Looking over his shoulder he saw that the bear was closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he tried to run even faster.
He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him.
At that instant the atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
It was then that a bright light shone upon the man and a voice from heaven asked, "You deny my existence for all of these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light. "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps, could you make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very well", said the Voice. The light went out, and the sounds of the forest resumed.
And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful, Amen."

Wolf counselor Loc: Heart of Texas

Perfect.

That just made my day

Iliamna1

That is truly the fattest bear I've ever seen ! ! ! Just give him a few months of hibernation. Great joke.

EL Loc: Massachusetts

Looks like that bear met up with more than a few atheists.

son of witless

And then what happened ? After the Atheist was converted to bear excrement, was he deposited in the woods.

Y360AZ

A very good OBG.

Noraa Loc: Kansas

Too funny Perm! Thanks for the laugh!!

PaulPisces Loc: San Francisco

I immediately sent this off to my sister, whose kids (and grandkids) are avid hunters and devout Christians too. I hope it makes them laugh as much as it did me!

debeda

Lolololhahahaha that was HILARIOUS

Iliamna1

Then he was recycled by the dung beetles, all of which gave him a great funeral with multiple deep burials and after several decades later, the atheist reappeared as part of a small forest, all of which was cut down about a century later by a Christian-owned logging company and turned into furniture and houses. But the atheist was blissfully unaware of his new beginnings forever after.

son of witless

And all because he got himself eaten by a bear. I sure love happy endings. Left out of the story, was that once a bear eats a human, an Atheist qualifies, I know I know bearly, the bear is always tracked down and destroyed. Fortunately the bear was skinned and made into a rug. It now decorates the den of an unknown Agnostic, who couldn't care less what the bear's last meal was.

permafrost Loc: Minnesota

LOL, we can only hope he did not bring it to town...

son of witless

Do you remember the bear guy who was eaten by a grizzly in Alaska ? I saw the documentary. It was sad.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/tv/tv-news/harrowing-final-moments-couple-eaten-21760040

Iliamna1

I do remember that incident. It should be noted that moose annually kill and injure more people in Alaska than bears, though. Moose are thoroughly grouchy animals.

son of witless

Very true, however being eaten besides being killed is insult to injury. A starving moose will not eat you.