slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas

By Samanthata Jane Kinzer-Barstow, Ca.

Becoming a hero...means having to live long distances from the people you love and often feeling alone.
It means early mornings and late nights.
It means waking up in pain and going to bed knowing there will no relief the next day.
It means learning how to live with your 'symptoms' and trying to live your life like a 'normal' person.
It means bottling your emotions in fear of being seen as weak.
It means CT scans, MRIs and losing countless hours of your life in a waiting room.

Becoming a hero...is prioritizing your sleep by your pill count.
It means repeating yourself a thousand times because no one cares about what is happening in your mind.
It's putting a Band-Aid on a bullet wound.
It's smiling when you're screaming inside.
It's feeling alone in a room full of people who have no idea what the world is like for you.

Becoming a hero...is hiding your scars when society strips away your armor and takes away your defenses.

Becoming a hero...is having to relive your regrets every time someone says "Thank your for your service."
When you struggle every day to erase it from your mind.
It's searching for outlets to take the weight of your guilt off your spirit.
It's loving your country when it doesn't always love you back.
It's begging your family to understand when they can't relate to your experiences.
It's drowning in sympathies when all you need is empathy.
It means hiding your issues with substances because nobody told you it would change your very core.

Beoming a hero...is never trusting people again.
It's never seeing good in people because you've witnessed the evil that people are capable of.
It's pushing people away because it's easier to be alone than to live through the arguments and fights about your tainted points of view.
It's never unseeing what you wish you had never seen.
It's finding comfort in silence when your mind is louder than your willpower.
It's always being on guard.
It's becoming an expert wall builder.

Becoming a hero...is feeling at home when your world is crashing 'round you.
It's feeling expendable.
It's hurting the people you love to protect them from you hurting them more.
It's waking up in tears.
It's missing the places and activities you once enjoyed.

Becoming a hero...is watching your peers pursue their professional careers while you feed your family with your VA disabilities.
It's being sick and tired of politicians trying to capitalize on your pain by making empty promises for your vote.

Why would anyone want to become a hero?

Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon

PTSD is real and I have seen its effects on some of the vets I know.. The one thing they have in common is they can't live with what they did. The best warrior does not have to kill.

badbobby Loc: texas

thanks Slat
there were many shattered minds in the 'Nam'war
It was a bad war
but the young men who were sent to fight it weren't bad
and they certainly didn't deserve the treatment they were handed by the American people when they returned

lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas

Good question.