Don G. Dinsdale Loc: El Cajon, CA (San Diego County)

How Old Is Grandpa?

Stay with this -- the answer is at the end.

It may blow you away.

One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events.

The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools,
the computer age, and just things in general.

The Grandfather replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before:

'Television
'Penicillin
'Polio shots
'Frozen foods
'Xerox
'Contact lenses
'Frisbee's and
'The pill

There were no:
'Credit cards
'Laser beams or
'Ball-point pens

Man had not invented:
'Pantyhose
'Air Conditioners
'Dishwashers
'Clothes Dryers
'and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and
'Space travel was only in Flash Gordon books.

Your Grandmother and I got married first,... and then lived together.

Every family had a father and a mother. Until I was 25, I called every woman older than me, "mam". And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir".

We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.

Our lives were governed by the Bible, Good Judgment, and Common Sense. We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.

Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege... We thought fast food was eating half a biscuit while running to catch the school bus.

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.

Draft dodgers were those who closed front doors as the evening breeze started.

Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends-not purchasing condominiums.

We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.

We listened to Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan ' on it, it was junk.

The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam....

Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.

We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.

You could buy a new Ford Coupe for $600, ... but who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

In my day:
'"Grass" was mowed,
'"Coke" was a cold drink,
'"Pot" was something your mother cooked in and
'"Rock Music" was your grandmother's lullaby.
'"Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,
'"Chip" meant a piece of wood,
'"Hardware" was found in a hardware store and
'"Software" wasn't even a word.

And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.

How old do you think I am?

I bet you have this old man in mind...you are in for a shock!

Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.

Are you ready ?????

This man would be 70 years old today.

70 years ago was 1947. (I Was Born In 1943... Don D.)

GIVES YOU SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT...

PASS THIS ONTO THE OLD ONES.

The younger generation would not understand, they're Snowflakes!!

pafret Loc: Northeast

A little off in two areas, FM radio was invented in 1933 by Edwin Armstrong who also invented the Superhetrodyne circuitry for improved radio reception. He designed an oscillator circuit which bears his name. Another inventyor invented the Colpitts Oscillator and a joke among radio geeks was that we had an Armpitts oscilator and "they stink."
An ashpitts oscillator was a burned out Colpitts (vacuum tube era).

Cocaine is a derivative of the coca leaves chewed by the Andean Indians to permit hard manual labor at altitudes. It was also given to the Indians the Spanish used as slaves to mine and extract gold. Particularly the ones used to tread out the amalgam in the patio process. Cocaine was derived by a German Chemist in 1859 so it and its use was around a lot longer than your grandpa could possibly be alive.

Other than those two, the rest look to be about right. Most of it applies to me and I'm 81.

Kazudy

Don, I can relate to all that, I was born in 1943 too.

pappadeux Loc: Phoenix AZ

Ist of all You and I would get along just fine, however, I don't know where they got the word"Snowflakes" from as it only snows in the colder months and where I live in Southwest AZ. none at all.So in order to cover all situations, I would suggest the term "Negamites" as they tend to be negative and resemble those pesky "mites" in that you just can't be rid of the "bastards"

bahmer

Same here.

Kazudy

Next year I'll be celebrating 3/4's of a century old. I want to bring strippers to the nursing home, but they are giving me a hard time about it. They say that I can have strippers, but they must be residents there. Hell I see them everyday, my weak eyes want to see new stuff. Any suggestions?

pappadeux Loc: Phoenix AZ

Gottcha all beat but not by much. 1938 in which GM created their first 'concept' which was the Buick Y-JOB the basic concept was used on GM production cars all the way into the early 50's. Talking about 'rubbers' there was an old bugger who looked more dead than alive and could get a 'date' at any cost.So he found an ad for life-size sex doll equipped the necessary 'extras' He sent away for this doll and upon receiving it jumped for joy and started to this ravish good-looking doll. He started to drop his draws when she abruptly turned him down. If you believe this I have a 'good' used car to sell you...

pafret Loc: Northeast

Try the internet, must be plenty of strippers on U-Tube. I know you can find endless numbers of big booty bimbos twerking on U-tube videos. In addition to being readily accessible they will be a lot less pruney than your co-residents.

pappadeux Loc: Phoenix AZ

Try Porn.com, covers a wide spectrum of girls and events.

Armageddun Loc: The show me state

An 80-year-old Texas rancher goes to the Mayo clinic in Rochester for a check-up.

The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, 'How do you stay in such great physical condition?'

'I'm from Texas and in my spare time I like to hunt and fish' says the old guy, 'and that's why I'm In such good shape. I'm up well before daylight riding herd and mending fences and when I'm not doing that, I'm out hunting or fishing. In the evening, I have a beer and all is well.'

'Well' says the doctor, 'I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your father when he died?'

'Who said my father's dead?'

The doctor is amazed. 'You mean you're 80 years old and your father's still alive? How old is he?'

'He's 100 years old,' says the old Texan. 'In fact he worked with and hunted with me this morning, and then we went to the topless bar for a while and had some beer and that's why he's still alive. He's a Texas rancher and he's a hunter and fisherman too.'

'Well,' the doctor says, 'that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than that. How about your father's father? How old was he when he died?'

'Who said my Grandpa's dead?'

Stunned, the doctor asks, 'you mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's' still alive?'

'He's 118 years old,' says the man.

The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, 'So, I guess he went hunting with you this morning too?'

'No, Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today.'

At this point the doctor is close to losing it. 'Getting married!! Why would a 118 year-old guy want to get married?'

'Who said he wanted to?'

pafret Loc: Northeast

Gotta love those Texans!

bahmer

Excellent thanks.