Squiddiddler Loc: Phoenix

Dear Ma and Pa,

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all the places
Get filled up.

I was restless at first because you get to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m. But I am getting used to sleeping late now. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your bunk and shine some stuff. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

Men got to shave but it is not that bad, because there's warm water here. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the city boys that live on coffee. Their food, plus yours, holds you until noon when you get fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

We go on "forced marches," which the platoon sergeant says is necessary to harden us.
If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A "forced march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in big trucks.

The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting awards for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don't move, and It ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training.You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy. It ain't like fighting with them boys back home. I'm about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake . I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130 pounds and he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,
Alice

Betta

I started laughing at Dear Ma and Pa. The ending is the bombshell of all bombshells. Loved it!

Justsss Loc: Wisconsin

Loved it ! Thanks for the laugh this morning.

bahmer

Very good .

badbobby Loc: texas

that lil gal
would put Slat and Papa to shame

bahmer

It sounds like Alice has a little AuntiE in her.

badbobby Loc: texas

maybe a lot of Auntie
prolly Aunties kin

bahmer

Alice is probably the one that trained AuntiE's guard cats and taught them to shoot.

PLT Sarge Loc: Alabama

Have read this before in a different version. Love it, knew where it was going but still had to read it. Basic was easy for us country boys. Got a lot of laughs out of the city boys.