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What the GOP gave America
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Jul 11, 2017 13:28:34   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
alabuck wrote:
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My voices don't even speak in English and they still expect me to do as they say!

And, no, this isn't a slam against foreigners. Aliens, maybe. When they dim make themselves visible, they have antennae coming up and out of their heads; (kinda like, Mr. Martin from, "My Favorite Martian." I hope y'all remember that old TV show.)

Anyway, they're a bunch of short, little fuckers, with big, beady eyes, big, bald heads, and no lips or ears. Oddly, they only show-up when I'm sleeping. I've invited them to make their presence known when I'm awake, but they decline. They say they don't want to scare the other Earthlings. I said that's very considerate on their part, but it makes me look like some sort of weirdo as I'm the only one who sees or hears them. They said, "Not to worry. Loki, archie and slatten hear us, too, they just don't know it's us."

So, there you have it, gentlemen. Our heads are filled by Martians. Who woulda thunk it?
---------- br br My voices don't even speak in En... (show quote)


Well, sometimes those little lipless guys save me.
They did this morning at work, and again 10 minutes ago when I had to answer a call from what has to be the STUPIDEST woman on the planet.
This morning I asked: Do I knee her in the puss, punch her in the tit, or square on the jaw, and lay her out?
The voice said: Walk away for a minute, come back, and explain it one more time.
So I did. Didn't work.
Next I asked: Why does this stupid butch keep calling me about common sense shit?
The voice said: Because you left your phone on dumbass!

Voices aren't always bad!

Reply
Jul 11, 2017 13:31:43   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
alabuck wrote:
----------

My voices don't even speak in English and they still expect me to do as they say!

And, no, this isn't a slam against foreigners. Aliens, maybe. When they dim make themselves visible, they have antennae coming up and out of their heads; (kinda like, Mr. Martin from, "My Favorite Martian." I hope y'all remember that old TV show.)

Anyway, they're a bunch of short, little fuckers, with big, beady eyes, big, bald heads, and no lips or ears. Oddly, they only show-up when I'm sleeping. I've invited them to make their presence known when I'm awake, but they decline. They say they don't want to scare the other Earthlings. I said that's very considerate on their part, but it makes me look like some sort of weirdo as I'm the only one who sees or hears them. They said, "Not to worry. Loki, archie and slatten hear us, too, they just don't know it's us."

So, there you have it, gentlemen. Our heads are filled by Martians. Who woulda thunk it?
---------- br br My voices don't even speak in En... (show quote)

No, sir. Arch & I are Texans. Any critters in our heads would be driven out by massive quantities of BBQ, Lone Stars and jalapenos.

Reply
Jul 11, 2017 13:51:16   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
slatten49 wrote:
No, sir. Arch & I are Texans. Any critters in our heads would be driven out by massive quantities of BBQ, Lone Stars and jalapenos.


OH! Have you tried the Hormel jalapeño bacon?

Reply
 
 
Jul 11, 2017 13:56:43   #
alabuck Loc: Tennessee
 
slatten49 wrote:
No, sir. Arch & I are Texans. Any critters in our heads would be driven out by massive quantities of BBQ, Lone Stars and jalapenos.


--------

Nah, they just want you to think that they're not there. Plus, I've been to Texas a few times. It's a beautiful state! My brother used to live in Roundrock, years ago. Those little creatures are running around everywhere! I've seen them. I know they're there. They THRIVE on BBQ sauce and ja-lop-e-noes. They're like aphrodisiacs to those little guys. They eat those things and, and, and, and, let's just say, it's one hell of a block party!

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Jul 11, 2017 14:03:48   #
alabuck Loc: Tennessee
 
archie bunker wrote:
OH! Have you tried the Hormel jalapeño bacon?


--------

Have you tried any Ol Smokey Salty Caramel Moonshine? Ahh, Man! That's some smooth stuff! 3-4 shots of that and you're feeling real good!

Reply
Jul 11, 2017 16:27:37   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
archie bunker wrote:
OH! Have you tried the Hormel jalapeño bacon?

Love it

Reply
Jul 11, 2017 16:28:48   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
alabuck wrote:
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Have you tried any Ol Smokey Salty Caramel Moonshine? Ahh, Man! That's some smooth stuff! 3-4 shots of that and you're feeling real good!

That sounds like some Tennessee concoction.

Reply
 
 
Jul 11, 2017 19:53:32   #
alabuck Loc: Tennessee
 
slatten49 wrote:
That sounds like some Tennessee concoction.


-------

Oh yea! And sooooo goooood, too!!

Reply
Jul 11, 2017 21:20:08   #
Loki Loc: Georgia
 
alabuck wrote:
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From my experiences, techs are the people who actually perform the tasks FOR the doctors. The doctors don't preform the X-rays or MRIs, they just "interpret" the results.

My orthopedic surgeon told me that most doctors NEVER take any advanced courses in radiological measurements, beyond the ONE that they're required to take in school. As such, they couldn't tell the difference between a broken bone and a twig. Which is why so many miss what's on an X-ray.

Techs are trained on how to operate the equipment but not on how to interpret the findings. However, with experience, most techs can interpret them. The problem is that there is, usually, a high turnover in techs because hospital's don't like to pay their techs very much. The same holds true for EMTs. Most get burned-out, dealing with low pay and high stress.

On a side note, Loki, one of our Nashville TV stations ran an expose' recently. It detailed how many states collect taxes and fees from their citizens for 911 Emergency Services but NEVER give the full amount collected to the proper departments so they can maintain and up-grade their Emergency Services. Instead, the money goes to cutting the grass on state property or for advertising tourist attractions in the state, or painting the interior of county courthouses, or even for pressure-washing the exterior of the Governor's Mansion.

No wonder the ambulance made a wrong turn. They, probably, didn't have an up-dated GPS system in their vehicle. Instead, the Governor got his house washed and your county courthouse got a fresh coat of paint! Wasn't that so kind of them?!
----------- br br From my experiences, techs are ... (show quote)


Bear in mind these are the same morons who couldn't get an IV started. It's not surprising they couldn't find me. I doubt they could find their asses with both hands.

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Jul 11, 2017 21:35:02   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
alabuck wrote:
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Oh yea! And sooooo goooood, too!!

Where did you hear that

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Jul 11, 2017 22:55:55   #
alabuck Loc: Tennessee
 
slatten49 wrote:
Where did you hear that



-------------------

personal experience.

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