(I'm too old for all of them)
01) "There are many mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz SL500." Lynn Lavner
02) "It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married." George Burns
03) "Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship." Sharon Stone
04) "Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps." Tiger Woods
05) "My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.” Jack Nicholson
06) "Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is." Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)
07) "Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet." Robin Williams
08) "According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, whereas, men are just grateful. Robert De Niro
09) "There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?" Dustin Hoffman
10) "There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked !" Jerry Seinfeld
11) "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." Robin Williams
12) "It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom." Joan Rivers
13) “Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful, and natural experiences money can buy. “ Steve Martin
14) "You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for later in life." Elmo Phillips
15"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same." Oscar Wild
16) Jane Fonda recently remarked that she isn't having sex anymore because "she's had so much of it"! Fonda also joked that her "favorite" ex-husband Ted Turner would say "if you wait too long it grows over."
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