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Denmark Offers to Buy U.S.
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Aug 20, 2019 16:45:45   #
acknowledgeurma
 
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/denmark-offers-to-buy-us?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_082019&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bd681ab24c17c104804095a&cndid=52928333&esrc=bounceX&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz

By Andy BorowitzAugust 16, 2019

COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)—After rebuffing Donald J. Trump’s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.

“As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,” a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. “We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.”

“Denmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government,” the spokesperson added.

A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country “to be determined,” with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.

If Denmark’s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. “We believe that, by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,” the spokesperson said.


Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.

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Aug 20, 2019 17:08:59   #
BigMike Loc: yerington nv
 
acknowledgeurma wrote:
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/denmark-offers-to-buy-us?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_082019&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bd681ab24c17c104804095a&cndid=52928333&esrc=bounceX&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz

By Andy BorowitzAugust 16, 2019

COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)—After rebuffing Donald J. Trump’s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.

“As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,” a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. “We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.”

“Denmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government,” the spokesperson added.

A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country “to be determined,” with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.

If Denmark’s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. “We believe that, by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,” the spokesperson said.


Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/de... (show quote)


Turnabout is fair play.

Trump is using this story as a diversion and it appears the government of Denmark is playing along. I wonder what Trump is really up to...

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Aug 20, 2019 17:12:17   #
Robert Wilson Loc: Texas
 
Let's trade; We will turn over the title to east L.A. slums,( Pelosi's territory), to Denmark for the title to Greenland.

Reply
 
 
Aug 20, 2019 17:15:34   #
BigMike Loc: yerington nv
 
Robert Wilson wrote:
Let's trade; We will turn over the title to east L.A. slums,( Pelosi's territory), to Denmark for the title to Greenland.


For God's sake bro'! Don't waste an opportunity! Give them everything north of San Diego and west of Riverside all the way to Seattle! Not just LA county!

Reply
Aug 20, 2019 17:38:17   #
acknowledgeurma
 
Robert Wilson wrote:
Let's trade; We will turn over the title to east L.A. slums,( Pelosi's territory), to Denmark for the title to Greenland.

You should get you're geography strait (no pun):
https://www.google.com/search?q=California%E2%80%99s+12th+congressional+district&stick=H4sIAAAAAAAAAOPgE-LUz9U3MDQqMyxRAjNTyswqq7QMspOt9NPzy1KL8nJT80r0S-OL45Pz89KLUouLC1KLivPzrJJLi4qAUgr5aWmZyamLWLWcE3My0_KL8jITHzXMLFYwNCrJUIDpyczPS8xRSMksLinKTC4BALhPadF3AAAA&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiBrIbIs5LkAhVIgK0KHfLJCIIQmxMoAjApegQIDRAe&biw=1920&bih=937
Nancy Pelosi, a Democrat, has represented the district since January 2013. Currently, the 12th district is entirely within the city of San Francisco

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Aug 20, 2019 17:41:06   #
BigMike Loc: yerington nv
 
acknowledgeurma wrote:
You should get you're geography strait (no pun): b... (show quote)


Ooooo! I bet that hurt!

Reply
Aug 20, 2019 18:21:46   #
maximus Loc: Chattanooga, Tennessee
 
acknowledgeurma wrote:
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/denmark-offers-to-buy-us?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_082019&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bd681ab24c17c104804095a&cndid=52928333&esrc=bounceX&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz

By Andy BorowitzAugust 16, 2019

COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)—After rebuffing Donald J. Trump’s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.

“As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,” a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. “We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.”

“Denmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government,” the spokesperson added.

A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country “to be determined,” with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.

If Denmark’s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. “We believe that, by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,” the spokesperson said.


Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/de... (show quote)




Trump's answer would be...if you need to know the price, you can't afford it.
Or...serious inquiries only.
And maybe...we will sell Puerto Rico but only if the democratic party goes with it.
Or possibly...get 20 percent off if you agree to buy California also. ( Homeless must go with the state).

Reply
 
 
Aug 20, 2019 18:25:19   #
Lonewolf
 
maximus wrote:
Trump's answer would be...if you need to know the price, you can't afford it.
Or...serious inquiries only.
And maybe...we will sell Puerto Rico but only if the democratic party goes with it.
Or possibly...get 20 percent off if you agree to buy California also. ( Homeless must go with the state).


Trump's already sold us to putin

Reply
Aug 20, 2019 19:02:14   #
Blade_Runner Loc: DARK SIDE OF THE MOON
 
Lonewolf wrote:
Trump's already sold us to putin
Did you know that the United States, under president Andrew Johnson (D), purchased Alaska from the Russians. Paid $7.2 million.

The House of Reps impeached Johnson, the senate acquitted him by one vote.

Lonewolf wrote:
Trump's already sold us to putin
Have you received your draft notice from the Russian army?

Reply
Aug 20, 2019 19:17:29   #
Lonewolf
 
This is all deflection to get you to look some place else next week it will be him going to the moon with stormy Daniels anything to take your mind off the crashing economy that's all he has crashing the economy and 15 foot of wall for almost 3 years

Reply
Aug 21, 2019 00:13:50   #
BigMike Loc: yerington nv
 
Lonewolf wrote:
This is all deflection to get you to look some place else next week it will be him going to the moon with stormy Daniels anything to take your mind off the crashing economy that's all he has crashing the economy and 15 foot of wall for almost 3 years


Um...sorry to piss in your cornflakes but Trump had a very specific reason for bringing this up now, I've learned, that has nothing to do with acquiring Greenland but rather what Greenland has been used for.

I guess it is a deflection, but not for what you think.

Reply
 
 
Aug 21, 2019 06:26:50   #
Radiance3
 
acknowledgeurma wrote:
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/denmark-offers-to-buy-us?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_082019&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bd681ab24c17c104804095a&cndid=52928333&esrc=bounceX&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz

By Andy BorowitzAugust 16, 2019

COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)—After rebuffing Donald J. Trump’s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.

“As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,” a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. “We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.”

“Denmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government,” the spokesperson added.

A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country “to be determined,” with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.

If Denmark’s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. “We believe that, by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,” the spokesperson said.


Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/de... (show quote)

============
Of course this is satirical. But there is a possibility. We could start selling them San Francisco and Los Angeles. These are populated by democrats and I am sure they love the climate change.

Reply
Aug 21, 2019 07:10:51   #
Big Kahuna
 
acknowledgeurma wrote:
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/denmark-offers-to-buy-us?utm_campaign=aud-dev&utm_source=nl&utm_brand=tny&utm_mailing=TNY_Borowitz_082019&utm_medium=email&bxid=5bd681ab24c17c104804095a&cndid=52928333&esrc=bounceX&utm_term=TNY_Borowitz

By Andy BorowitzAugust 16, 2019

COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)—After rebuffing Donald J. Trump’s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.

“As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,” a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. “We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.”

“Denmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government,” the spokesperson added.

A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country “to be determined,” with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.

If Denmark’s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. “We believe that, by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,” the spokesperson said.


Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/de... (show quote)


Everything was literally for sale in our country when Hitlery was Secretary of State and Ovommit was our resident. As I recall, 20% of our uranium sources were sold to Russia and the pay to play policy of the corrupt Clinton Foundation ruled the day! Ovommit and Mooch would have sold our country if given the chance. They sold our country out , why not sell our land too?

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Aug 21, 2019 10:19:32   #
Lonewolf
 
Radiance3 wrote:
============
Of course this is satirical. But there is a possibility. We could start selling them San Francisco and Los Angeles. These are populated by democrats and I am sure they love the climate change.


We should sell red States first they keep your people in poverty Nar constant drain on the federal government to keep them afloat

Reply
Aug 21, 2019 10:20:43   #
Lonewolf
 
drlarrygino wrote:
Everything was literally for sale in our country when Hitlery was Secretary of State and Ovommit was our resident. As I recall, 20% of our uranium sources were sold to Russia and the pay to play policy of the corrupt Clinton Foundation ruled the day! Ovommit and Mooch would have sold our country if given the chance. They sold our country out , why not sell our land too?


No uranium was sold we buy uranium from Russia !

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