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On good friends
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Dec 31, 2013 22:03:56   #
rumitoid
 
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was frighteningly and disgustingly short, and precise: more booze. Nothing else mattered nearly as much, including my young daughter, job, or integrity. A beer made all the world right; two made it nearly perfect; a six pack divine. And that was true for a decade and a half, with small blips of conscience.

On 1/8/84, my good dead friend Tolty showed up at my local bar to talk. I know that my erudition that night totally floored him, leaving him no alternative but to get physical in response, or at least how I saw it before his hay-maker knocked me out. I woke up in his house on Long Island, the Hamptons; he had become very successful. This was 1984. Other things had happened leading to getting sober but this was not one of them. How dare he? Take away choice and embarrass me with your wealth: suck an egg. But I have always been a sucker for the hootie-tootie, as the BB might have noted. Big-shootism it is called.

I barely relented on my attacks of him, and I had scathing ammunition. For weeks on end I sought every way possible to undermine and embarrass him. Then there was a Labor Day party; I unloaded my best shoot. No reaction. Instead, he looked at me with such gentleness and love I was stunned to silence. Then he walked over, looked me in the eyes a moment, and hugged me. I have not been the same since. That was almost thirty years ago.

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Dec 31, 2013 23:21:58   #
bmac32 Loc: West Florida
 
REAL friends bring out the best in us, God bless your friend.



rumitoid wrote:
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was frighteningly and disgustingly short, and precise: more booze. Nothing else mattered nearly as much, including my young daughter, job, or integrity. A beer made all the world right; two made it nearly perfect; a six pack divine. And that was true for a decade and a half, with small blips of conscience.

On 1/8/84, my good dead friend Tolty showed up at my local bar to talk. I know that my erudition that night totally floored him, leaving him no alternative but to get physical in response, or at least how I saw it before his hay-maker knocked me out. I woke up in his house on Long Island, the Hamptons; he had become very successful. This was 1984. Other things had happened leading to getting sober but this was not one of them. How dare he? Take away choice and embarrass me with your wealth: suck an egg. But I have always been a sucker for the hootie-tootie, as the BB might have noted. Big-shootism it is called.

I barely relented on my attacks of him, and I had scathing ammunition. For weeks on end I sought every way possible to undermine and embarrass him. Then there was a Labor Day party; I unloaded my best shoot. No reaction. Instead, he looked at me with such gentleness and love I was stunned to silence. Then he walked over, looked me in the eyes a moment, and hugged me. I have not been the same since. That was almost thirty years ago.
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was f... (show quote)

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Jan 1, 2014 00:02:03   #
larry
 
bmac32 wrote:
REAL friends bring out the best in us, God bless your friend.


I had a good friend that suddenly died and nobody told me about it. When I wrote to him, my letters came back unopened because no one knew what else to do with them. I was devastated to think that I had neglected my friend to such a point that He was gone and I hadn't kept in touch with him at all. What kind of a friend was I? How do you stop feeling guilty over such a stupid thing as being too busy to contact people that you love and want to be with.

Now I think about others, and I hope they think about me once in a while. I try to write or call them at least once a month. It is amazing how lazy we become and how important we think what we are doing without thinking about those we care about. When I don't get a reply to my messages, I think they too have taken the final trip. But fortunately, they are just as lazy as I am, and finally write back.
Holiday cards are good reminders, we snap out of our self once in a while. Happy New Year everyone.

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Jan 1, 2014 00:53:58   #
rumitoid
 
larry wrote:
I had a good friend that suddenly died and nobody told me about it. When I wrote to him, my letters came back unopened because no one knew what else to do with them. I was devastated to think that I had neglected my friend to such a point that He was gone and I hadn't kept in touch with him at all. What kind of a friend was I? How do you stop feeling guilty over such a stupid thing as being too busy to contact people that you love and want to be with.

Now I think about others, and I hope they think about me once in a while. I try to write or call them at least once a month. It is amazing how lazy we become and how important we think what we are doing without thinking about those we care about. When I don't get a reply to my messages, I think they too have taken the final trip. But fortunately, they are just as lazy as I am, and finally write back.
Holiday cards are good reminders, we snap out of our self once in a while. Happy New Year everyone.
I had a good friend that suddenly died and nobody ... (show quote)


I deserted the best friend of my life; I saw him as some sort of holier than thou figure. Like you, I neglected him. I was lucky he did not take no (or fu) for an answer.

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Jan 1, 2014 08:09:04   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
To all my new friends on the OPP, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

May our friendships grow...in quantity, and in quality.

Unlike Family, you can pick your friends! :wink: :mrgreen:

Reply
Jan 1, 2014 08:19:08   #
bmac32 Loc: West Florida
 
Like many of us here I had a friend just have a massive heart attack and die at work. I missed it because he worked first shift and I worked 3rd. We had been in the meeting room at work just a couple hours before joking around and I get a call, that just made me sit down, he was 38 and no heart problems before this.


larry wrote:
I had a good friend that suddenly died and nobody told me about it. When I wrote to him, my letters came back unopened because no one knew what else to do with them. I was devastated to think that I had neglected my friend to such a point that He was gone and I hadn't kept in touch with him at all. What kind of a friend was I? How do you stop feeling guilty over such a stupid thing as being too busy to contact people that you love and want to be with.

Now I think about others, and I hope they think about me once in a while. I try to write or call them at least once a month. It is amazing how lazy we become and how important we think what we are doing without thinking about those we care about. When I don't get a reply to my messages, I think they too have taken the final trip. But fortunately, they are just as lazy as I am, and finally write back.
Holiday cards are good reminders, we snap out of our self once in a while. Happy New Year everyone.
I had a good friend that suddenly died and nobody ... (show quote)

Reply
Jan 1, 2014 11:08:53   #
Floyd Brown Loc: Milwaukee WI
 
rumitoid wrote:
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was frighteningly and disgustingly short, and precise: more booze. Nothing else mattered nearly as much, including my young daughter, job, or integrity. A beer made all the world right; two made it nearly perfect; a six pack divine. And that was true for a decade and a half, with small blips of conscience.

On 1/8/84, my good dead friend Tolty showed up at my local bar to talk. I know that my erudition that night totally floored him, leaving him no alternative but to get physical in response, or at least how I saw it before his hay-maker knocked me out. I woke up in his house on Long Island, the Hamptons; he had become very successful. This was 1984. Other things had happened leading to getting sober but this was not one of them. How dare he? Take away choice and embarrass me with your wealth: suck an egg. But I have always been a sucker for the hootie-tootie, as the BB might have noted. Big-shootism it is called.

I barely relented on my attacks of him, and I had scathing ammunition. For weeks on end I sought every way possible to undermine and embarrass him. Then there was a Labor Day party; I unloaded my best shoot. No reaction. Instead, he looked at me with such gentleness and love I was stunned to silence. Then he walked over, looked me in the eyes a moment, and hugged me. I have not been the same since. That was almost thirty years ago.
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was f... (show quote)


Would the phrase "The milk of human kindness" fit?

We all could use a hug or give a hug like that.

Perhaps if we all could give each other that kind of hug most of our problems would not be as large.

Reply
 
 
Jan 1, 2014 11:13:50   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
Floyd Brown wrote:
Would the phrase "The milk of human kindness" fit?

We all could use a hug or give a hug like that.

Perhaps if we all could give each other that kind of hug most of our problems would not be as large.


:thumbup: including that political crevasse that plagues us.

Reply
Jan 1, 2014 11:17:40   #
Searching Loc: Rural Southwest VA
 
slatten49 wrote:
To all my new friends on the OPP, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

May our friendships grow...in quantity, and in quality.

Unlike Family, you can pick your friends! :wink: :mrgreen:


:thumbup: I second the motion!! As friendships grow, it is "my" hope that understanding will, as well. :)

Reply
Jan 1, 2014 11:17:42   #
oldladyfromwaco
 
That is my description of a true friend. He was working on a purpose, and changed your life. Divine intervention on two legs.



rumitoid wrote:
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was frighteningly and disgustingly short, and precise: more booze. Nothing else mattered nearly as much, including my young daughter, job, or integrity. A beer made all the world right; two made it nearly perfect; a six pack divine. And that was true for a decade and a half, with small blips of conscience.

On 1/8/84, my good dead friend Tolty showed up at my local bar to talk. I know that my erudition that night totally floored him, leaving him no alternative but to get physical in response, or at least how I saw it before his hay-maker knocked me out. I woke up in his house on Long Island, the Hamptons; he had become very successful. This was 1984. Other things had happened leading to getting sober but this was not one of them. How dare he? Take away choice and embarrass me with your wealth: suck an egg. But I have always been a sucker for the hootie-tootie, as the BB might have noted. Big-shootism it is called.

I barely relented on my attacks of him, and I had scathing ammunition. For weeks on end I sought every way possible to undermine and embarrass him. Then there was a Labor Day party; I unloaded my best shoot. No reaction. Instead, he looked at me with such gentleness and love I was stunned to silence. Then he walked over, looked me in the eyes a moment, and hugged me. I have not been the same since. That was almost thirty years ago.
When I was drinking, my agenda of importance was f... (show quote)

Reply
Jan 1, 2014 13:16:37   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
slatten49 wrote:
To all my new friends on the OPP, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

May our friendships grow...in quantity, and in quality.

Unlike Family, you can pick your friends! :wink: :mrgreen:


That is why I picked you.

Reply
 
 
Jan 1, 2014 16:16:39   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
That is why I picked you.


:oops: Back at ya, Salty. :thumbup: :mrgreen:

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Jan 2, 2014 13:23:21   #
rockhawk95 Loc: Louisiana
 
about how much feed does a llama eat everyday per llama?

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Jan 2, 2014 13:37:25   #
rockhawk95 Loc: Louisiana
 
i have just about raised everything from rabbits..geese..ducks...hogs...cattle..chickens...dogs...horses....when my boy was little bout 2 3 yrs.
old the ducks would stay at the pond all day come to my house to feed after that they would get im the little swimmiing pool with him couldnt hardly get them out....good memories

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Jan 2, 2014 13:39:05   #
rockhawk95 Loc: Louisiana
 
i have just about raised everything from rabbits..geese..ducks...hogs...cattle..chickens...dogs...horses....when my boy was little bout 2 3 yrs.
old the ducks would stay at the pond all day come to my house to feed after that they would get im the little swimmiing pool with him couldnt hardly get them out....good memories

Reply
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