One Political Plaza - Home of politics
Home Active Topics Newest Pictures Search Login Register
General Chit-Chat (non-political talk)
Doctor and Patient
Apr 9, 2015 11:46:48   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."

The man perks up. So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"

"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."

Reply
Apr 9, 2015 12:08:07   #
skott Loc: Bama
 
PoppaGringo wrote:
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."

The man perks up. So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"

"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head ... (show quote)


Funny because it could happen.

Reply
Apr 9, 2015 12:58:55   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
I had to groan on this one...at the likelihood of believing the story. :roll:

Reply
 
 
Apr 9, 2015 12:59:53   #
PaulPisces Loc: San Francisco
 
PoppaGringo wrote:
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."

The man perks up. So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"

"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head ... (show quote)




Hilarious! I love sharing your jokes with my friends, and this is a really good one. Thanks for sharing.

Reply
Apr 9, 2015 13:08:53   #
mouset783 Loc: Oklahoma
 
PoppaGringo wrote:
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."

The man perks up. So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"
thu the mud
"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head ... (show quote)

Brings this to mind. A man keeps stepping on his penis ,d**gging it thru the mud and getting it all dirty. His wife keeps nagging him to do something about it so he makes an appointment with a doctor who says you come in at ten. go to preop at 10 thirty,surgery at eleven,recovery for one hour and home the same day.He tells his wife who can't believe it is that simple so she calls the doctor who repeats the same information. She then says you are going to make his legs longer right?

Reply
Apr 9, 2015 13:48:25   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
mouset783 wrote:
Brings this to mind. A man keeps stepping on his penis ,d**gging it thru the mud and getting it all dirty. His wife keeps nagging him to do something about it so he makes an appointment with a doctor who says you come in at ten. go to preop at 10 thirty,surgery at eleven,recovery for one hour and home the same day.He tells his wife who can't believe it is that simple so she calls the doctor who repeats the same information. She then says you are going to make his legs longer right?


:lol: :lol: :lol: :thumbup:

Reply
Apr 9, 2015 14:15:25   #
Armageddun Loc: The show me state
 
mouset783 wrote:
Brings this to mind. A man keeps stepping on his penis ,d**gging it thru the mud and getting it all dirty. His wife keeps nagging him to do something about it so he makes an appointment with a doctor who says you come in at ten. go to preop at 10 thirty,surgery at eleven,recovery for one hour and home the same day.He tells his wife who can't believe it is that simple so she calls the doctor who repeats the same information. She then says you are going to make his legs longer right?


You Dawg You :thumbup: :thumbup: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Reply
 
 
Apr 10, 2015 16:25:22   #
Alicia Loc: NYC
 
PoppaGringo wrote:
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."

The man perks up. So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"

"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head ... (show quote)

*************************

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Still laughing.

Reply
Apr 10, 2015 20:26:40   #
badbobby Loc: texas
 
PoppaGringo wrote:
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head to foot.

The doctor comes in and says, "Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a huge pile-up on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, however, your penis was severed in the accident and we couldn't find it."

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, "You have $9000 in insurance compensation coming and we now have the technology to build a new penis. They work great but they don't come cheap. It's roughly $1000 an inch."

The man perks up. So, the doctor says, "You must decide how many inches you want. But understand that you have been married for over thirty years and this is something you should discuss with your wife. If you had a five incher before and get a nine incher now she might be a bit put out. If you had a nine incher before and you decide to only invest in a five incher now, she might be disappointed. It's important that she plays a role in helping you make a decision." The man agrees to talk it over with his wife.

The doctor comes back the next day, "So, have you spoken with your wife?"

"Yes I have," says the man.

"And has she helped you make a decision?"

"Yes" says the man.

"What is your decision?" asks the doctor.

"We're getting granite counter tops."
A man wakes up in the hospital bandaged from head ... (show quote)



a sensible compromise
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Reply
If you want to reply, then register here. Registration is free and your account is created instantly, so you can post right away.
General Chit-Chat (non-political talk)
OnePoliticalPlaza.com - Forum
Copyright 2012-2024 IDF International Technologies, Inc.