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Dec 13, 2014 00:51:28   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
Courtesy of UncleE

WHERE'S BELLE?


A little girl asked her Mom: "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"

Her mother replied, “No, because she is in heat."

"What's that mean?" asked the child.

"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."

Her father said, "Bring Belle over here."

Being old school he took a rag, soaked it with a little gasoline, and dabbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said, "OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block."

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, her father asked, “Where’s Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway around the block, so another dog is pushing her home."

Reply
Dec 13, 2014 11:46:15   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
AuntiE wrote:
Courtesy of UncleE

WHERE'S BELLE?


A little girl asked her Mom: "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"

Her mother replied, “No, because she is in heat."

"What's that mean?" asked the child.

"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."

Her father said, "Bring Belle over here."

Being old school he took a rag, soaked it with a little gasoline, and dabbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said, "OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block."

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, her father asked, “Where’s Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway around the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
Courtesy of UncleE br br WHERE'S BELLE? br b... (show quote)



What a helpful, kind and generous dog he is for pushing her home.

:lol: :thumbup: :lol:

UncleE needs to contribute a little more often. :thumbup:

Reply
Dec 13, 2014 15:03:40   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
AuntiE wrote:
Courtesy of UncleE

WHERE'S BELLE?


A little girl asked her Mom: "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"

Her mother replied, “No, because she is in heat."

"What's that mean?" asked the child.

"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."

Her father said, "Bring Belle over here."

Being old school he took a rag, soaked it with a little gasoline, and dabbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said, "OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block."

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, her father asked, “Where’s Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway around the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
Courtesy of UncleE br br WHERE'S BELLE? br b... (show quote)


My daughter has a dog named Belle, had to send this to her. Funny
:thumbup: :thumbup:

Reply
 
 
Dec 13, 2014 15:27:04   #
Worried for our children Loc: Massachusetts
 
AuntiE wrote:
Courtesy of UncleE

WHERE'S BELLE?


A little girl asked her Mom: "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"

Her mother replied, “No, because she is in heat."

"What's that mean?" asked the child.

"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."

Her father said, "Bring Belle over here."

Being old school he took a rag, soaked it with a little gasoline, and dabbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said, "OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block."

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, her father asked, “Where’s Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway around the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
Courtesy of UncleE br br WHERE'S BELLE? br b... (show quote)




Lol, you know I had to send this to T. 👍👍👍👍

Reply
Dec 13, 2014 15:43:27   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
Worried for our children wrote:
Lol, you know I had to send this to T. 👍👍👍👍


She needs a laugh. One more week before Christmas break.

Reply
Dec 13, 2014 16:46:19   #
rumitoid
 
AuntiE wrote:
Courtesy of UncleE

WHERE'S BELLE?


A little girl asked her Mom: "Mom, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?"

Her mother replied, “No, because she is in heat."

"What's that mean?" asked the child.

"Go ask your father. I think he's in the garage."

The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mom, but she said the dog was in heat, and to come to you."

Her father said, "Bring Belle over here."

Being old school he took a rag, soaked it with a little gasoline, and dabbed the dog's backside with it to disguise the scent, and said, "OK, you can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time round the block."

The little girl left and returned a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Surprised, her father asked, “Where’s Belle?"

The little girl said, "She ran out of gas about halfway around the block, so another dog is pushing her home."
Courtesy of UncleE br br WHERE'S BELLE? br b... (show quote)


Just this morning I said it looks like the world is going to the dogs and it seems I was right. If only we could find such compassion to help our kind.

Reply
Dec 13, 2014 16:56:43   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
rumitoid wrote:
Just this morning I said it looks like the world is going to the dogs and it seems I was right. If only we could find such compassion to help our kind.


I have compassion. I am more then willing to push you. We just will not discuss how or where to. 8-) :roll: :-P :lol:

Reply
 
 
Dec 13, 2014 18:45:39   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
AuntiE wrote:
I have compassion. I am more then willing to push you. We just will not discuss how or where to. 8-) :roll: :-P :lol:


:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:

Reply
Dec 13, 2014 18:46:07   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
slatten49 wrote:
What a helpful, kind and generous dog he is for pushing her home.

:lol: :thumbup: :lol:

UncleE needs to contribute a little more often. :thumbup:


:thumbup:

Reply
Dec 14, 2014 10:32:36   #
alex Loc: michigan now imperial beach californa
 
rumitoid wrote:
Just this morning I said it looks like the world is going to the dogs and it seems I was right. If only we could find such compassion to help our kind.


the govt is trying to

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Dec 16, 2014 10:20:50   #
Armageddun Loc: The show me state
 
AuntiE wrote:
I have compassion. I am more then willing to push you. We just will not discuss how or where to. 8-) :roll: :-P :lol:


You Dawg You :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Reply
 
 
Dec 16, 2014 10:21:48   #
Armageddun Loc: The show me state
 
AuntiE wrote:
I have compassion. I am more then willing to push you. We just will not discuss how or where to. 8-) :roll: :-P :lol:



Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?



The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a
deserted street with your wife
and two small children.

Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife
comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you,
screams obscenities,
raises the knife, and charges at you...

You are carrying a
Colt 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?



THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:
Which of the following most closely matches your answer?



Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
What is a Colt 1911 cal. 45 ACP?
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
How many rounds does this magazine hold?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just k*****g me?
Does he definitely want to k**l me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
This is all so confusing!


............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......... ..
Republican's Answer:
BANG!


............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......

Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

Click..... (Sounds of reloading)

Reply
Dec 16, 2014 13:59:39   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
Armageddun wrote:
Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?



The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a
deserted street with your wife
and two small children.

Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife
comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you,
screams obscenities,
raises the knife, and charges at you...

You are carrying a
Colt 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?



THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:
Which of the following most closely matches your answer?



Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
What is a Colt 1911 cal. 45 ACP?
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
How many rounds does this magazine hold?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just k*****g me?
Does he definitely want to k**l me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.
Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
This is all so confusing!


............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......... ..
Republican's Answer:
BANG!


............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......

Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?... (show quote)


I don't know Armi, I think Southerners are better shots than that, why waste good bullets on bad guys :wink: :wink:

Reply
Dec 16, 2014 14:24:53   #
alex Loc: michigan now imperial beach californa
 
BearK wrote:
I don't know Armi, I think Southerners are better shots than that, why waste good bullets on bad guys :wink: :wink:


that's why I like my 12 ga. with buckshot the pellets are only.31 cal but there are nine of them every time I pull the trigger

Reply
Dec 16, 2014 14:27:38   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
It's late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation in South Dakota asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild.

He was used to a modern society, and had never been taught the old secrets, but to cover up his lack of knowledge - he said he had to study conditions and would get back to them. So he went to town and called the National Weather Service, and asked them what the forecast was for the winter. They told him it was going to be quite cold and a snowy. He goes back to the reservation and tells that to everyone, and tells them to collect firewood.

A couple of weeks later, he goes back to town and figures he will check with the NWS again. This time they tell him it's going to be very cold and lots of snow. So he goes back to the reservation and orders everyone to collect every scrap of wood they can find.

He's feeling pretty confident, no matter what happens the tribe will be covered. He starts to get nervous and figures maybe he should check one more time to be sure, so when he goes to town he calls the NWS once more. This time they tell him it will be really cold, heavy snows - just a bad winter. He wonders why the changes so he asks, "How can you be so sure?"

The weatherman replies, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy."

The purpose of this story



Remember it whenever you get advice from an official.

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