Thanksgiving Divorce
A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,"I h**e to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.
"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're s**k of each other, and I'm s**k of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this,"
She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."
"A new survey found that 80% of men say they helped with Thanksgiving dinner. Which makes sense, when you hear they consider "that smells good" helping." Jimmy Fallon
"The meal isn't over when I' m full, the meal is over when I h**e myself." Chris C.K.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL--AND I MEAN ALL!
rumitoid wrote:
Thanksgiving Divorce
A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,"I h**e to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.
"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're s**k of each other, and I'm s**k of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this,"
She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."
"A new survey found that 80% of men say they helped with Thanksgiving dinner. Which makes sense, when you hear they consider "that smells good" helping." Jimmy Fallon
"The meal isn't over when I' m full, the meal is over when I h**e myself." Chris C.K.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL--AND I MEAN ALL!
Thanksgiving Divorce br br A man in Phoenix calls... (
show quote)
Very funny story. Thank you. Happy Thanksgiving.
Had enough wrote:
Very funny story. Thank you. Happy Thanksgiving.
Happy Thanksgiving to you. That last line from Chris C.K. has become my Thanksgiving Day mantra.
rumitoid wrote:
Happy Thanksgiving to you. That last line from Chris C.K. has become my Thanksgiving Day mantra.
Here's hoping then you h**e yourself. Lol :mrgreen:
AuntiE
Loc: 45th Least Free State
rumitoid wrote:
Thanksgiving Divorce
A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,"I h**e to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.
"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're s**k of each other, and I'm s**k of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."
Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this,"
She calls Phoenix immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."
"A new survey found that 80% of men say they helped with Thanksgiving dinner. Which makes sense, when you hear they consider "that smells good" helping." Jimmy Fallon
"The meal isn't over when I' m full, the meal is over when I h**e myself." Chris C.K.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL--AND I MEAN ALL!
Thanksgiving Divorce br br A man in Phoenix calls... (
show quote)
Thanksgiving Divorce gave me a full :lol: :lol: :!:
AuntiE
Loc: 45th Least Free State
cant beleve wrote:
Here's hoping then you h**e yourself. Lol :mrgreen:
I am ashamed of you, for this comment! You should have more dignity. :hunf: :( :-( :XD:
AuntiE wrote:
I am ashamed of you, for this comment! You should have more dignity. :hunf: :( :-( :XD:
Auntie, it was simply about overstuffing oneself at dinner, to such a point, as many usually do this day, to regrettable proportions. .
AuntiE
Loc: 45th Least Free State
rumitoid wrote:
Auntie, it was simply about overstuffing oneself at dinner, to such a point, as many usually do this day, to regrettable proportions. .
Oops. I wil apologize to him.
AuntiE
Loc: 45th Least Free State
cant beleve wrote:
Here's hoping then you h**e yourself. Lol :mrgreen:
I am sorry for the
"ashamed of you" comment. I missed the joke and misinterpreted what you meant. :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops:
AuntiE wrote:
I am sorry for the "ashamed of you" comment. I missed the joke and misinterpreted what you meant. :oops: :oops: :oops: :oops:
I was wondering why you responded the way you did, but thought I had misinterpreted something. glad it is straightened out.
AuntiE
Loc: 45th Least Free State
no propaganda please wrote:
I was wondering why you responded the way you did, but thought I had misinterpreted something. glad it is straightened out.
It was my
"misinterpreted". I am embarassed I misunderstood the joke response. :oops: :oops: :cry: :oops:
AuntiE wrote:
It was my "misinterpreted". I am embarassed I misunderstood the joke response. :oops: :oops: :cry: :oops:
Within this group I do not think anyone really believed you meant harm to anyone. It is not your style, in spite of the frying pan threats.
no propaganda please wrote:
Within this group I do not think anyone really believed you meant harm to anyone. It is not your style, in spite of the frying pan threats.
I think she did it on porpoise not just for the halibut..... :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Armageddun wrote:
I think she did it on porpoise not just for the halibut..... :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Halibut? Halibut? You had halibut and did not invite me? My life no longer has porpoise.
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