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Nov 22, 2014 01:17:19   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"

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Nov 22, 2014 01:29:05   #
Worried for our children Loc: Massachusetts
 
AuntiE wrote:
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"
I normally do not do political humor directly nam... (show quote)






Lol, good one 👍👍👍👍

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Nov 22, 2014 01:42:26   #
grace scott
 
Worried for our children wrote:
Lol, good one 👍👍👍👍



Good one? I'm a liberal, and I thought it was GREAT.

Reply
 
 
Nov 22, 2014 01:45:36   #
Snoopy
 
AuntiE wrote:
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"
I normally do not do political humor directly nam... (show quote)



Auntie

Reminds me of a movie:

Mission Impossible

Snoopy

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Nov 22, 2014 01:57:38   #
Hemiman Loc: Communist California
 
Poor genie,two impossible request in one day.

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Nov 22, 2014 02:12:30   #
grace scott
 
Hemiman wrote:
Poor genie,two impossible request in one day.





:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: I like Hillary, but she is one ugly woman. (I hope no one I know sees this, they would say I am a fine one to talk.)

Reply
Nov 22, 2014 05:35:24   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
grace scott wrote:
:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: I like Hillary, but she is one ugly woman. (I hope no one I know sees this, they would say I am a fine one to talk.)
I didn't know Hillary was ugly. To me very few people are.

:thumbup:

Reply
 
 
Nov 22, 2014 05:37:42   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
AuntiE wrote:
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"
I normally do not do political humor directly nam... (show quote)
I got a good chuckle thanks.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :thumbup:

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Nov 22, 2014 05:38:31   #
Hemiman Loc: Communist California
 
Coos Bay Tom wrote:
I didn't know Hillary was ugly. To me very few people are.

:thumbup:


How did you lose your eyesight.?

Reply
Nov 22, 2014 06:11:21   #
astrolite
 
Coos Bay Tom wrote:
I didn't know Hillary was ugly. To me very few people are.

:thumbup:


You can see the H**E burning through! Maybe when she is asleep she won't look so h**eful? Makes me a bit sorry for Bill (but only a very small bit).

Reply
Nov 22, 2014 07:33:23   #
lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas
 
AuntiE wrote:
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"
I normally do not do political humor directly nam... (show quote)


Pragmatism, you gotta love it. I dream the impossible dream, then wake up and try to make ends meet. I'd have better luck with the dog too. :?

Reply
 
 
Nov 22, 2014 08:43:12   #
Blacksheep
 
AuntiE wrote:
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"
I normally do not do political humor directly nam... (show quote)


Good joke. Hillary is one ooogly person, inside and out. My sympathies are with the puppy.

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Nov 22, 2014 10:26:36   #
the waker Loc: 11th freest nation
 
Good one Auntie E !

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Nov 22, 2014 10:48:36   #
BearK Loc: TN
 
astrolite wrote:
You can see the H**E burning through! Maybe when she is asleep she won't look so h**eful? Makes me a bit sorry for Bill (but only a very small bit).


Yes, let's face it - there are some really beautiful people who have such ugly dispositions they turn you away faster than meeting Satan in a dark alley. Then there are some, that have such a beautiful personality, that it shines through to make a very plain face beautiful.

It's sad, but there really isn't a whole lot you can do with just plain ugly. Bill sort of hit the bottom of the barrel - with her looks and personality (that must have been a double barrel).

Reply
Nov 22, 2014 11:28:50   #
Armageddun Loc: The show me state
 
AuntiE wrote:
I normally do not do political humor directly naming a politican. Sometimes the rules must be broken, because this is flatly way too good!


Bill Clinton was visiting the House when he accidentally ran over the Obama’s new puppy, Sunny, crushing it flat as a fritter. He climbed out of his Rolls and sat down on the grass totally distraught. He knew Michele would go friggin' ballistic.

Then he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, brushed it off and immediately a Genie popped out. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said the Genie "As a reward I shall grant you one wish."

"Well," said Bill, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this damned dog."

They walk over to the splattered remains of Sunny. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me?" Bill asked. The Genie looked at the remains and shook his head. "This critter is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Maybe there's something else you'd like?"

Bill thought for a minute, reached into his pocket and pulled out two photos. "I had an affair with this beautiful young girl called Monica," said Bill, showing the genie the first photo. "But I’m actually married to this woman called Hillary" and he showed the genie the second photo. "You see Hillary isn't beautiful at all, so do you think you can make her look like Monica?"

The Genie studied the two photographs and after a few minutes said, "Damn, let's have another look at the dog!"
I normally do not do political humor directly nam... (show quote)


Shame Shame, :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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