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Lewinsky
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Oct 13, 2014 15:19:22   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
After a relaxing bath, Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself naked
in a mirror, remembering her times with Bill Clinton.

Her frustration over her inability to lose weight was depressing her.

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help . . . "God, if you take away my love handles, I'll dev**e my life to you," she prayed.

And just like that, her ears fell off.

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Oct 13, 2014 15:27:11   #
PaulPisces Loc: San Francisco
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
After a relaxing bath, Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself naked
in a mirror, remembering her times with Bill Clinton.

Her frustration over her inability to lose weight was depressing her.

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help . . . "God, if you take away my love handles, I'll dev**e my life to you," she prayed.

And just like that, her ears fell off.



LOL. Reminds me of one of my favorite sayings:

"Let go of my ears. I know what I'm doing."

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Oct 13, 2014 15:45:56   #
no propaganda please Loc: moon orbiting the third rock from the sun
 
PaulPisces wrote:
LOL. Reminds me of one of my favorite sayings:

"Let go of my ears. I know what I'm doing."


Next line to that is "ow that hurts.

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Oct 13, 2014 16:16:23   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
no propaganda please wrote:
Next line to that is "ow that hurts.


The ears or what?

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Oct 13, 2014 16:21:53   #
no propaganda please Loc: moon orbiting the third rock from the sun
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
The ears or what?


not the ears. nobody bit his ear.

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Oct 14, 2014 18:40:49   #
hedgewm
 
no propaganda please wrote:
Next line to that is "ow that hurts.


What did the Beaver say after sex? Gee Wally, that hurt!

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Oct 14, 2014 19:14:45   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
hedgewm wrote:
What did the Beaver say after sex? Gee Wally, that hurt!


Isn't that also what Reid said to Franks?

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Oct 14, 2014 23:44:21   #
Armageddun Loc: The show me state
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
After a relaxing bath, Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself naked
in a mirror, remembering her times with Bill Clinton.

Her frustration over her inability to lose weight was depressing her.

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help . . . "God, if you take away my love handles, I'll dev**e my life to you," she prayed.

And just like that, her ears fell off.


You Dawg You :shock: :shock: :shock: :oops: :oops: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

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Oct 14, 2014 23:49:39   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
Armageddun wrote:
You Dawg You :shock: :shock: :shock: :oops: :oops: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:


I know...I'm just terrible. :oops:

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Oct 15, 2014 23:12:04   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
After a relaxing bath, Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself naked
in a mirror, remembering her times with Bill Clinton.

Her frustration over her inability to lose weight was depressing her.

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help . . . "God, if you take away my love handles, I'll dev**e my life to you," she prayed.

And just like that, her ears fell off.
Good one Gringo

:lol:

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Oct 16, 2014 02:19:57   #
RockKnutne Loc: Valhöll
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
After a relaxing bath, Monica Lewinsky was looking at herself naked
in a mirror, remembering her times with Bill Clinton.

Her frustration over her inability to lose weight was depressing her.

In an act of desperation, she decided to call on God for help . . . "God, if you take away my love handles, I'll dev**e my life to you," she prayed.

And just like that, her ears fell off.


No entiendo mi amigo... :shock: :shock: :shock:

Es una broma, I got it.

That made me laugh OG, reminds me of just why the country v**es democrat every so often, we just need fresh material!

See if you agree.

A week before Lincoln was shot he was in Monroe, Maryland.
A week before Kennedy was shot he was in Marilyn Monroe.

JFK and Bobby walk into a bar and the bartender says,
"What'll it be?"
JFK says, "Give us a couple of shooters."

(I know, that one was bad)

What's the difference between Amy Fischer and Teddy Kennedy?
Teddy k**led his Mary Jo.

Why did Maria Shriver marry Arnold Schwarzenegger?
They're trying to make a bulletproof Kennedy.

Finally,

Why did God create booze?
So Ted Kennedy would never be president.

In fifty more years or fifty more minutes depending on your perspective, they will be saying and laughing to great ones such as these:

Q: Barack Obama is on a sinking ship, who gets saved?
A: The Country!

Q: Whats Michelle Obamas favorite vegetable?
A: Barackoli

Q: What’s the difference between Ross Perot and Barack Obama?
A: Ross Perot is crackpot with big ears; Barack Obama is a pothead with big ears.

Last one, honest Injun.

U.S Presidents and Statesmen are on every piece Of U.S. currency. So Will Barack Obama Be Placed On The FoodStamp Card?

Buenas noches & Hasta mañana!

:XD: :XD: :XD:

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Oct 16, 2014 12:35:25   #
PoppaGringo Loc: Muslim City, Mexifornia, B.R.
 
Loved 'em all.

Obola deserves to be on the food stamp cards, it is his true legacy.

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Oct 16, 2014 13:20:22   #
Coos Bay Tom Loc: coos bay oregon
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
Loved 'em all.

Obola deserves to be on the food stamp cards, it is his true legacy.
Obola now . Geeze it must be confusing to have so many nick names. I wish food stamps did not exist. Commoditys are what should be distributed. I talk to grocery store employees who are upset because of food stamp recipients eating better than they do and they work.

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Oct 16, 2014 16:18:33   #
RockKnutne Loc: Valhöll
 
Old_Gringo wrote:
Loved 'em all.

Obola deserves to be on the food stamp cards, it is his true legacy.


Sí señor! Obola... , I'm still grinning "ear to ear" here!

:thumbup: :XD: :XD: :XD:

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Oct 16, 2014 16:39:53   #
RockKnutne Loc: Valhöll
 
Coos Bay Tom wrote:
Obola now . Geeze it must be confusing to have so many nick names. I wish food stamps did not exist. Commoditys are what should be distributed. I talk to grocery store employees who are upset because of food stamp recipients eating better than they do and they work.


Tom,

When I got discharged from the military, I had a problem with getting my unemployment benefits while I looked for work. I filed for them in one state, then moved to another. While waiting on the bureaucracy to catch up with me, my wife and I almost became destitute. We had money coming, just didn't have any idea when we could expect it. I broke down and went to apply for Food Stamps. They asked if we had any children and, I told them no. They came back at me scowling and told me my monthly benefit would be $2.00 each and every month.

I was dumbfounded, blown away really. I told them to just keep it and, give it to somebody who was needier. The Food Stamp program is one of the most abused government programs in this country today. It doesn't make sense to spend the kind of taxpayer money the government does and, just throw away good food?

I guaran-dag-gone-tee that if the government would have given me a can of Beanie Weenies and a hunk of cheese that day, instead of the promise of $2.00 at the start of the next month, I would have been extremely grateful and, my wife and I would have never went to bed hungry that night!

God bless America huh?

:roll: :roll: :roll:

Should have listened to my parents and went to college first!
Should have listened to my parents and went to col...

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