Harry And Meghan Announce Birth Of Beautiful 'Half-Oppressed, Half-Privileged Baby'...(Satire from The Babylon Bee)
Jun 8, 2021 12:43:52 #
Harry And Meghan Announce Birth Of Beautiful 'Half-Oppressed, Half-Privileged Baby'...(Satire from The Babylon Bee)
WORLD—Prince Harry and Meghan, The Duke and Duchess of Sussex, have announced the arrival of a beautiful new baby. In the announcement, they described their new baby as "a beautiful, 7 pound, 11-ounce baby girl who is half-oppressed and half-privileged."
"Mother and baby are doing well," said Prince Harry to reporters. "Even in these early days, we are making sure to teach our child that she carries the blood of white colonial oppressors, as well as oppressed people of color. This unique mix may make raising our child extremely difficult."
Expert critical theorists also expressed worry that the child may grow up fighting a constant internal battle between her oppressor self and her oppressed self.
"It is very rare that these two sides achieve perfect equilibrium," said sociology Professor Tawdro Dingletook of Yale University. "It's likely this child will either be doomed to a lifetime of being an evil oppressor, or a horribly oppressed minority. She will never fully belong on either side. This is why we need to bring back racial segregation--to keep this kind of thing from happening."
Local non-college-educated electrician Joe Yoder disagrees. "Maybe Harry and Meghan are simply two precious human souls made in God's image, and their baby is too, and all this 'oppression' stuff is nonsense."
At the time of publication, it is unclear exactly where Mr. Yoder got his crazy ideas, but it's probably safe to ignore them since he doesn't have a college degree.
https://babylonbee.com/news/harry-and-meghan-announce-birth-of-one-quarter-oppressed-three-quarters-privileged-baby
WORLD—Prince Harry and Meghan, The Duke and Duchess of Sussex, have announced the arrival of a beautiful new baby. In the announcement, they described their new baby as "a beautiful, 7 pound, 11-ounce baby girl who is half-oppressed and half-privileged."
"Mother and baby are doing well," said Prince Harry to reporters. "Even in these early days, we are making sure to teach our child that she carries the blood of white colonial oppressors, as well as oppressed people of color. This unique mix may make raising our child extremely difficult."
Expert critical theorists also expressed worry that the child may grow up fighting a constant internal battle between her oppressor self and her oppressed self.
"It is very rare that these two sides achieve perfect equilibrium," said sociology Professor Tawdro Dingletook of Yale University. "It's likely this child will either be doomed to a lifetime of being an evil oppressor, or a horribly oppressed minority. She will never fully belong on either side. This is why we need to bring back racial segregation--to keep this kind of thing from happening."
Local non-college-educated electrician Joe Yoder disagrees. "Maybe Harry and Meghan are simply two precious human souls made in God's image, and their baby is too, and all this 'oppression' stuff is nonsense."
At the time of publication, it is unclear exactly where Mr. Yoder got his crazy ideas, but it's probably safe to ignore them since he doesn't have a college degree.
https://babylonbee.com/news/harry-and-meghan-announce-birth-of-one-quarter-oppressed-three-quarters-privileged-baby
Jun 8, 2021 12:46:25 #
Oldsailor65 wrote:
Harry And Meghan Announce Birth Of Beautiful 'Half... (show quote)
I hope raising their child will be extremely difficult for these two greedy nutcases. One should never bite the hand that feeds you, especially publicly.
Jun 8, 2021 12:53:43 #
Carol Kelly wrote:
I hope raising their child will be extremely difficult for these two greedy nutcases. One should never bite the hand that feeds you, especially publicly.
Two of the most d********g (people?) on the Planet.
Jun 8, 2021 14:39:19 #
Oldsailor65 wrote:
Harry And Meghan Announce Birth Of Beautiful 'Half... (show quote)
Duke and duchess of suckits!
Jun 8, 2021 14:40:43 #
Carol Kelly wrote:
I hope raising their child will be extremely difficult for these two greedy nutcases. One should never bite the hand that feeds you, especially publicly.
Wonder how many times he visited the island while she gestated!!
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