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UncleE Strikes - Again! :-))
Jul 27, 2014 16:37:20   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
This is simply to good to wait for next Saturday!

In parochial school, students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination is OK to express the t***h differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings:

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?'

'Of course child. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next please!'

Reply
Jul 27, 2014 17:28:28   #
archie bunker Loc: Texas
 
AuntiE wrote:
This is simply to good to week for next Saturday!

In parochial school, students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination is OK to express the t***h differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings:

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?'

'Of course child. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next please!'
This is simply to good to week for next Saturday! ... (show quote)


Now THAT is funny!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup:

Reply
Jul 27, 2014 17:32:20   #
AuntiE Loc: 45th Least Free State
 
archie bunker wrote:
Now THAT is funny!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :thumbup: :thumbup:


Because I love language and word usage.

Reply
 
 
Jul 28, 2014 07:18:35   #
cant beleve Loc: Planet Kolob
 
[quote=AuntiE]This is simply to good to wait for next Saturday!

In parochial school, students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination is OK to express the t***h differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings:

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?'

'Of course child. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next pleapleasesp :twisted: :mrgreen:sorry my tablet is acting screwy

Reply
Jul 28, 2014 07:44:32   #
MrEd Loc: Georgia
 
AuntiE wrote:
This is simply to good to wait for next Saturday!

In parochial school, students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination is OK to express the t***h differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings:

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?'

'Of course child. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next please!'
This is simply to good to wait for next Saturday! ... (show quote)




Fantastic. I loved it. :XD: :XD: :XD: :XD: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:

Reply
Jul 28, 2014 12:57:17   #
bahmer
 
AuntiE wrote:
This is simply to good to wait for next Saturday!

In parochial school, students are taught that lying is a sin. However, instructors also advised that using a bit of imagination is OK to express the t***h differently without lying. Below is a perfect example of those teachings:

Getting a Hairdryer Through Customs

An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favor?'

'Of course child. What may I do for you?'

'Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?'

'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie.'

'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'

'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'

'I have a marvelous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'

Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next please!'
This is simply to good to wait for next Saturday! ... (show quote)


Excellent

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