ImLogicallyRight wrote:
To bad the Democrats have never heard it.
LET US NOT FORGET THESE `WAR WIMPS`
Mike Royko
CHICAGO TRIBUNE
On this, the Memorial Day weekend, we honor those who fell in battle. And those who didn`t fall, but came away limping. We even give a nod to ones who didn`t do any shooting, but were at least in uniform and available.
But I think it`s worth taking note of a special breed of hard-eyed, tough guys known as ''the war wimps.''
These are those chest-thumping right-wingers who are always eager to send someone else to war. But when they had their chance to bloody some c****es, they found it convenient to be elsewhere.
In the past, I`ve listed some of the better-known war wimps.
There`s Pat Buchanan, the commentator-politician who is always ready for a fight, if someone else does it.
But during the Vietnam War, when others his age were fighting and dying, he stayed home with a bad knee.
The knee is now sturdy enough for him to run four miles a day.
Then there is Newt Gingrich, a tough-guy congressman from Georgia. Why did he opt for college during Vietnam? He says: ''What difference would I have made? There was a bigger battle in Congress than Vietnam.'' Maybe, but there weren`t as many bullets flying on Capitol Hill.
Sylvester Stallone, who now makes millions by fighting the Vietnam War for cameras, spent the real war in college and teaching muscle-flexing at a rich girls school in Switzerland.
Pat Robertson qualifies as sort of a half war wimp. True, he was in the Marines. But according to some of his marine buddies, when the troopship headed for Korea, his senator-daddy pulled strings and had him dropped off in Japan.
There are many others. The Reagan administration has been loaded with missile-rattling heroes who spent the Vietnam War in college or other safe shelters.
And I`m pleased to have recently discovered another splendid example of the war-wimp species.
He is Morton Downey Jr., who has become an overnight sensation in shock television. He hosts a syndicated interview show during which he verbally stomps anyone who doesn`t share his simple-minded, bomb `em and k**l `em views.
Downey, who briefly did a low-rated radio show in Chicago, is hitting it big on national TV, developing a loyal following among those whose hairlines begin at their eyebrows and who move their lips when they read.
In looking into Downey`s past, I find that he and I are about the same age. And he`s the same age as my boyhood pals, Lennie from the Back of the Yards, Si from the Southwest Side and Connie from Humboldt Park.
Connie was k**led in Korea. I went there but was fortunate to suffer nothing more serious than a lump on my head when I celebrated the end of the war and fell into a ditch. Lennie and Si came out okay.
Then there`s Downey, who thunders about how we ought to go blow away anyone who bugs us.
But where was Downey when young men his age were slogging through the snow and mud of Korea?
Well, he`s sort of vague about that. He says that in his youth, his father, a wealthy and famous singer, used to take him to the Stork Club in New York. And he ran with the Manhattan upper crust.
There`s nothing in any of his biographical material to indicate that he took part in the Korean War or served in the military. Those who know him say he has never mentioned it.
As a Chicago broadcaster who worked with him said: ''That would have been the kind of thing he`d brag about. But he never even lied about it, although he lied about just about everything else. The only thing he`s t***hful about is being a male chauvinist pig.''
Curious as to why Downey missed the opportunity to serve his country, I tried to call him at his office in a New Jersey TV station, but he wasn`t around.
His public relations spokeswoman said she`d try to find out if and why he ducked the military. She later called back and said maybe Downey was in the Army, but maybe he wasn`t. She wasn`t sure.
Now, if right-winger Downey didn`t serve in the military when he had the opportunity, that doesn`t mean he doesn`t have the potential for bold, physical courage.
The fact is, he once became angry at a gay guest on his show and slapped the fellow on the cheek.
If nothing else, that`s a start for Downey. Maybe someday he`ll do spankings.
And oh so many more, too numerous to mention