Advice from a tax account for your stimulous check
Apr 2, 2020 17:08:06 #
LogicallyRight
Loc: Chicago
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q: Where will the government get this money?
A: From taxpayers.
Q: So the government is giving me back my own money?
A: Only a smidgen of it.
Q: What is the purpose of this payment?
A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy.
Q: Isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?
A: Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with and your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.
* if you spend it on gasoline, your money goes to the Arabs.
* if you purchase a computer, it goes to India,Taiwan or China.
* if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.
* if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
* if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan.
* if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to the management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead keep the money in America by:
(1) Spending it at a yard sale, or
(2) Go to a ballgame, or
(3) Spend it on prostitutes, or
(4) Beer, or
(5) Tattoos
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)
CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day.
No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.
Your friendly tax accountant
A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q: Where will the government get this money?
A: From taxpayers.
Q: So the government is giving me back my own money?
A: Only a smidgen of it.
Q: What is the purpose of this payment?
A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy.
Q: Isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?
A: Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with and your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.
* if you spend it on gasoline, your money goes to the Arabs.
* if you purchase a computer, it goes to India,Taiwan or China.
* if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.
* if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
* if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan.
* if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to the management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead keep the money in America by:
(1) Spending it at a yard sale, or
(2) Go to a ballgame, or
(3) Spend it on prostitutes, or
(4) Beer, or
(5) Tattoos
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)
CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day.
No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.
Your friendly tax accountant
Apr 2, 2020 17:35:30 #
Apr 2, 2020 17:44:03 #
Apr 2, 2020 21:26:30 #
LogicallyRight wrote:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment? br A: It ... (show quote)
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Lol..
Apr 3, 2020 07:24:05 #
LogicallyRight wrote:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment? br A: It ... (show quote)
Mine is going to the city, county, and the school district.
Apr 3, 2020 07:28:16 #
America 1
Loc: South Miami
LogicallyRight wrote:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment? br A: It ... (show quote)
Thanks, now know where mine is going American businesses here I come.
Apr 3, 2020 07:55:05 #
LogicallyRight wrote:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment? br A: It ... (show quote)
That’s all well and good, but what should my wife spend hers on ??
Apr 3, 2020 09:04:09 #
America 1
Loc: South Miami
Big dog wrote:
That’s all well and good, but what should my wife spend hers on ??
Like most women, shoes.
Apr 3, 2020 10:29:56 #
LogicallyRight wrote:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus payment? br A: It ... (show quote)
Or send it to the church to help others! Or h love others!!!
Apr 3, 2020 15:05:13 #
LogicallyRight
Loc: Chicago
Big dog wrote:
That’s all well and good, but what should my wife spend hers on ??
More garage sales.
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