New York, New York! If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere… but first, you need to understand what the people around you are saying.

Yes, like many major cities, New York has it’s very own, unique slang words that you’re unlikely to hear anywhere else. Here are 21 essential words and phrases to listen out for...

Brick---Very cold or almost freezing, e.g. “I’m not going out tonight – it’s brick out there!”

Whip---A very nice or expensive car. E.g. “Check out my new whip, man!”

The City---Yes, the whole of New York is a city, but to New Yorkers, this just means Manhattan

Schmear---A lot of cream cheese, for example, “One bagel with schmear, please”

Pie---Nope, unlike the rest of the English-speaking world, New Yorkers aren’t talking about a pastry-based food when they say pie. They’re talking about pizza!

Schvitz---A Jewish word for sweat that everyone in New York uses. E.g. “The subway was packed. I was schvitzing my ass off.”

Grill---To stare at someone for a long time, usually in a hostile way. E.g. “I’m gonna punch that guy if he doesn’t stop grilling me.”

Stoop---The stairs in front of an apartment building. E.g. “We sat out on the stoop and talked all night.”

Schtupp---To have sex with someone. E.g. “Yeah, I’d definitely schtupp her”.

Dumb---Very. E.g. “They do dumb good pie at the place on the corner”.

Gotham---New York City. It’s the name of the corrupt major city in Batman, so it’s a joke about New York.

Son---This is an affectionate term to call someone you know well. E.g. “C’mon son, we’re going out”.

Thirsty---To look desperate, e.g. “Don’t act so thirsty, man. Play it cool!”

Thirst-bucket---A really, really desperate person. E.g. “Chill, son! You’re acting like a total thirst-bucket”

Dead-ass---This means you are completely serious about something. E.g. “I’m dead-ass, son. You can’t do that.”

Tight---In other places, this is slang for being close friends with someone, for example, “I used to be tight with him before we had that fight.” In New York, though, it means upset. E.g. “Man, you shouldn’t have sent her that message last night. She’s tight over that.”

Mad---This isn’t about being crazy or angry. In fact, it just means “very”. E.g. “Yeah, she’s still mad tight over what you said to her.”

Spaz---To get really angry, violent or aggressive with someone. E.g. “The guy knocked my drink over and I just spazzed out at him.”

Take it There---Another phrase for getting into a fight. E.g. “Why you grilling me like that? You wanna take it there?”

Bodega---A small shop / grocery store where you go to get all your essential items, snacks and morning coffee.

Yooz ---Plural version of you. E.g. “Are yooz guys coming with us?”

I know the feeling

I was driving my dad to old Mexico for new false teeth.
I came out of a town going over a 100 mile an hour.
A highway patrolman stopped me.
Where are you going? Why are you speeding?
What's your social security number?
He didn't ask for my license.
I guess after I told him what I was doing, he might have thought I was a drug dealer.
I wanted to tell him, if you were driving my dad's T-Bird with a tape of him playing a fiddle, you'd be speeding too.
Then coming out, I was asked, do you have anything to declare?
No, and told them why I was there .
Step out of the car and open the trunk .
I thought oh dad, I hope you don't have anything weird in there .
I thought I was going to jail once for bringing an avocado out of there.