These jokes from/about Ireland are special because they are ... well ... short! For those of us with limited memory, but a desire to show our Irish side in a humorous way, these may be just the ticket!

An Irishman walked out of the bar and … please, don't interrupt! Yes it is possible!

Learning the Irish jig involves two simple steps: 1) serve people a lot of alcohol and 2) make sure that you have locked the bathroom door.

"Paddy," said Murphy, "how does it happen that when you drink, you can’t remember people’s names?"
"I don’t know," said Paddy, "it's a gift."

Question: Do you know why hurricanes are all named after women? Answer: When they come, they are wet and wild. When they go, they take your car and house with them.

A woman was in bed with her lover, telling her how stupid her Irish husband was. At that moment, the husband came home. “What are you two doing?!” he asked. “Didn’t I tell you that he was stupid?” the wife answered.

Question: Do you know what an Irish husband is? Answer: A man who has not kissed or touched his wife in 20 years but would k**l the man who tries to.

“Forgive me father for I have sinned,” an Irish girl said. “My boyfriend held my hand twice, kissed me three times and made love to me twice.” “Daughter! Go home, squeeze seven lemons and drink it straight down,” the priest said. “Will it help?” she asked. He said “No, but it will get that silly smile off your face!”

“Father, I have just shot down two British lieutenants and I knocked off a British captain,” O’Donnell said in one breath. “Father, are you listening? Father, have you fainted?” “Of course I haven’t fainted, son,” the priest replied. “I am waiting for you to stop talking about politics and start confessing your sins.”

Finnegan is drunk as usual. He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box. There is silence. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. He waits and waits. Finally, the priest pounds on the wall of the confessional box. “Ain’t no use in knocking,” Finnegan yells back. “There is no paper on this side, either!”

thanks for the laugh love irish jokes

These jokes from/about Ireland are special because they are ... well ... short! For those of us with limited memory, but a desire to show our Irish side in a humorous way, these may be just the ticket!

An Irishman walked out of the bar and … please, don't interrupt! Yes, it is possible!

Learning the Irish jig involves two simple steps: 1) serve people a lot of alcohol and 2) make sure that you have locked the bathroom door.

"Paddy," said Murphy, "how does it happen that when you drink, you can’t remember people’s names?"
"I don’t know," said Paddy, "it's a gift."

Question: Do you know why hurricanes are all named after women? Answer: When they come, they are wet and wild. When they go, they take your car and house with them.

A woman was in bed with her lover, telling her how stupid her Irish husband was. At that moment, the husband came home. “What are you two doing?!” he asked. “Didn’t I tell you that he was stupid?” the wife answered.

Question: Do you know what an Irish husband is? Answer: A man who has not kissed or touched his wife in 20 years but would k**l the man who tries to.

“Forgive me father for I have sinned,” an Irish girl said. “My boyfriend held my hand twice, kissed me three times and made love to me twice.” “Daughter! Go home, squeeze seven lemons and drink it straight down,” the priest said. “Will it help?” she asked. He said “No, but it will get that silly smile off your face!”

“Father, I have just shot down two British lieutenants and I knocked off a British captain,” O’Donnell said in one breath. “Father, are you listening? Father, have you fainted?” “Of course I haven’t fainted, son,” the priest replied. “I am waiting for you to stop talking about politics and start confessing your sins.”

Finnegan is drunk as usual. He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box. There is silence. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. He waits. Finally, the priest pounds on the wall of the confessional box. “Ain’t no use in knocking,” Finnegan yells back. “There is no paper on this side, either!”

Great, great stuff and coincidentally so very, very Irish, lol. I am a BIC, Bronx Irish Catholic. Back when I was younger, all the bars it seemed were owned by ex-patriots from the Emerald Isle and they all had a donation bucket for the IRA, not unlike the one for polio. Official looking. Which brings me to my favorite of your jokes: “Of course I haven’t fainted, son,” the priest replied. “I am waiting for you to stop talking about politics and start confessing your sins.” Brutally true, as we saw it back then.

These jokes from/about Ireland are special because they are ... well ... short! For those of us with limited memory, but a desire to show our Irish side in a humorous way, these may be just the ticket!

An Irishman walked out of the bar and … please, don't interrupt! Yes, it is possible!

Learning the Irish jig involves two simple steps: 1) serve people a lot of alcohol and 2) make sure that you have locked the bathroom door.

"Paddy," said Murphy, "how does it happen that when you drink, you can’t remember people’s names?"
"I don’t know," said Paddy, "it's a gift."

Question: Do you know why hurricanes are all named after women? Answer: When they come, they are wet and wild. When they go, they take your car and house with them.

A woman was in bed with her lover, telling her how stupid her Irish husband was. At that moment, the husband came home. “What are you two doing?!” he asked. “Didn’t I tell you that he was stupid?” the wife answered.

Question: Do you know what an Irish husband is? Answer: A man who has not kissed or touched his wife in 20 years but would k**l the man who tries to.

“Forgive me father for I have sinned,” an Irish girl said. “My boyfriend held my hand twice, kissed me three times and made love to me twice.” “Daughter! Go home, squeeze seven lemons and drink it straight down,” the priest said. “Will it help?” she asked. He said “No, but it will get that silly smile off your face!”

“Father, I have just shot down two British lieutenants and I knocked off a British captain,” O’Donnell said in one breath. “Father, are you listening? Father, have you fainted?” “Of course I haven’t fainted, son,” the priest replied. “I am waiting for you to stop talking about politics and start confessing your sins.”

Finnegan is drunk as usual. He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box. There is silence. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. He waits. Finally, the priest pounds on the wall of the confessional box. “Ain’t no use in knocking,” Finnegan yells back. “There is no paper on this side, either!”

These jokes from/about Ireland are special because they are ... well ... short! For those of us with limited memory, but a desire to show our Irish side in a humorous way, these may be just the ticket!

An Irishman walked out of the bar and … please, don't interrupt! Yes, it is possible!

Learning the Irish jig involves two simple steps: 1) serve people a lot of alcohol and 2) make sure that you have locked the bathroom door.

"Paddy," said Murphy, "how does it happen that when you drink, you can’t remember people’s names?"
"I don’t know," said Paddy, "it's a gift."

Question: Do you know why hurricanes are all named after women? Answer: When they come, they are wet and wild. When they go, they take your car and house with them.

A woman was in bed with her lover, telling her how stupid her Irish husband was. At that moment, the husband came home. “What are you two doing?!” he asked. “Didn’t I tell you that he was stupid?” the wife answered.

Question: Do you know what an Irish husband is? Answer: A man who has not kissed or touched his wife in 20 years but would k**l the man who tries to.

“Forgive me father for I have sinned,” an Irish girl said. “My boyfriend held my hand twice, kissed me three times and made love to me twice.” “Daughter! Go home, squeeze seven lemons and drink it straight down,” the priest said. “Will it help?” she asked. He said “No, but it will get that silly smile off your face!”

“Father, I have just shot down two British lieutenants and I knocked off a British captain,” O’Donnell said in one breath. “Father, are you listening? Father, have you fainted?” “Of course I haven’t fainted, son,” the priest replied. “I am waiting for you to stop talking about politics and start confessing your sins.”

Finnegan is drunk as usual. He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box. There is silence. The priest waits for Finnegan to start talking. He waits. Finally, the priest pounds on the wall of the confessional box. “Ain’t no use in knocking,” Finnegan yells back. “There is no paper on this side, either!”