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Paraprosdokian Sentences
Sep 14, 2019 17:56:28   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
Paraprosdokian sentences are figures of speech that use an unexpected ending to a sentence or phrase as in the examples which follow:

Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "if an emergency, notify:" I put 'DOCTOR'.

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

Some cause happiness where ever they go. Others whenever they go.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

War does not determine who is right...only who is left.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

If I agreed with you, then we would both be wrong.

We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Evening news is where they begin with "Good evening", and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.


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Sep 14, 2019 18:17:33   #
badbob85037
 
Hope you don't mine if I copy this. There are just to many good ones to remember

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Sep 14, 2019 18:30:17   #
slatten49 Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
badbob85037 wrote:
Hope you don't mine if I copy this. There are just to many good ones to remember

Bob, re-read the last one, and feel free to report your research.

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Sep 14, 2019 21:52:00   #
karpenter Loc: Headin' Fer Da Hills !!
 
I'm Going To Save It
Because It's Better Than The Quips They Post At Work

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Sep 15, 2019 08:25:52   #
lpnmajor Loc: Arkansas
 
slatten49 wrote:
Paraprosdokian sentences are figures of speech that use an unexpected ending to a sentence or phrase as in the examples which follow:

Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "if an emergency, notify:" I put 'DOCTOR'.

I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.

Some cause happiness where ever they go. Others whenever they go.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

War does not determine who is right...only who is left.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

If I agreed with you, then we would both be wrong.

We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Evening news is where they begin with "Good evening", and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

Paraprosdokian sentences are figures of speech tha... (show quote)



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Sep 15, 2019 16:00:02   #
Mike Easterday
 
These are good!!!

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